I'm sure you'll be fine

I have just found this room

all comments are so true ,the ones that really upset me are 

you are so brave ,  do i have a choice ?

but you look so well    ,    Well i always wear make up and my wig (never a bad hair day)   

Seriously everyone means well but just don t know what to say . Lots of my friends say they just don t know what to say and as my sister says you couldn't make all this sh t up as it is so awful 

xxxx

So true Fighting girl especially what your sister says  x

Oh yes, . Those comments and “you’re an inspiration”. To what, precisely, I wonder? I find it really baffling. 

I just read your profile. Have you come across the group living with incurable cancer? Great place for a rant where people really get it as well as sharing experiences of all sorts. We do lots of positive stuff too, such as a three good things thread where contributors write three good things from their day. I find it especially helpful when I am struggling 

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/living_with_incurable_cancer/discussions

Xx

Had to delete

Tvman

When is a rant not a rant?

When it's a reply to someone else's...

That made me laugh out loud, buttercup01

xx

It was about admin and I would have been in bother again! This may be the place to rant, but not about them!

Tvman

I feel like I have a winner in this particular game of bingo

i just got a message from a very longtime and very dear (until now!!) friend who, while chatting on what’s app (we live in different time zones) about our kids, I said I was dreading doing the teenage years alone (my husband is stage 4 incurable kidney cancer) she said, well   , you don’t know what is going to happen, people get cured form stage 4 cancer all the time, and your child doesn’t need your negativity, you must give her only good memories from now on, and it could be so much worse, I have another friend who’s child died.

well

where to even begin?

Vulpes, Wow.  I cant imagine what it was like to hear this. Yes I do think this deserves a prize: a small ice pick to chip at their cold heart, tweezers to get the blockage from your friend ears, cream for the callousness, and maybe a mirror withe speakers so that they could see and hear themselves.    I have to admit I also laughed out loud because it is so off that it is astonishing. 

I was going to come in with a rather lame  "cheer up luv it might never happen" comment from someone, but this pales in comparison.

Interested to hear what you plan to do in response to your friend, if anything.

You know Nellie, I actually laughed too.

my husband was so upset for me, but I’m not even mad. I just feel like, in order for her to be so tone deaf, so clueless makes me almost feel happy for her. Because it means she has led a charmed enough life that she can’t even comprehend what is happening to me. It is so far removed from her reality that her imagination, and subsequently her empathy has failed her. 

I have responded though. Because I deserve better from her.

i said, that no parent has the luxury of giving their children only happy memories, not even her. And that my child’s bad memories would not be caused by my being upset, but by her father dying. Of cancer. I said that I was sorry to hear a mutual friends child had died, and that I hoped she was giving him better support and understanding than she was giving me. I am not sure I will get a response!

i really feel that I can’t ask or expect anyone to make any of this better for me. But I can expect people not to make things worse for me, and it’s not an unreasonable expectation!