Struggling and Scared

Hi AlisonMax 

Sorry to hear about what you are going through, that sounds very difficult but good on you for getting him sipping water I am sure that will help. I know when my wife was really ill she found sucking on ice cubes quite helpful.

Does your hospice provide any hospice at home support?

Other than that I cannot really say I have any advice but might suggest you ring the helpline on 0800 808 0000, it is open 8am to 8pm and they may have some suggestions that might help.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Hi Steve

Thank you for responding.

It is so hard getting him to take anything now, he is still sipping water when I give it to him, but he is hardly eating - it feels like he is giving up.

I asked our GP about district nurses coming in but, he said that was really only for palliative care and the oncologist has given him the Sorafenib to start.  He did take a dose of it but has had severe pains since then. The oncologist is calling tomorrow so we'll see what happens from there.  I'll ask about hospice from home as he is adamant he doesn't want to go into hospital or a hospice. 

I'll try him with ice cubes, he did take some ice cream a couple of days ago, so fingers crossed.

I've dealt with some hard things in my life, losing both my parents and my sister to cancer but this is heartbreaking.

Thanks again, I'll give the helpline a call.

Alison

Hi Alison I'm sorry to read about your husband, it is indeed heartbreaking watching the one we love, often unable to do anything whilst also being terrified of what might be coming. My husband died in October and he basically stopped eating about 6 weeks before. Your husbands oncologist obviously has hop that treatment might work wheras my husbands had signed him off 2 months eaier saying here was nothing else that could be done.

My Tony had hospice at home as he wanted to die here and they were fantastic in those final days.

I wish you well when you speak to the oncologist tomorrow. Keep talking, it helps

Hi Malengwa

Thank you for your message, I'm so sorrry to hear about your husband, cancer is a horrible disease and heartbreaking to watch a loved one suffer.

Last night my husband said he didn't want any more morphine, I think it was making him feel too zoned out even though it was masking the pain.  He also asked for a curry - not that he ate much but ......

John wants to do hospice at home and although it wories me, I want to do what ever makes him feel safe and as comfortable as possible.

You're right it does help to talk, especially to someone who is/has gone through it. I can't imagine my life without him, we're together 24/7, I'm tearing up just typing this.

Thank you again

Alison