My girlfriend’s mum was diagnosed with lung cancer 3 years ago. Today, we found out that it has spread to her spine.
We don’t live together, and my girlfriend lives in the same house as her mum.
Our relationship hasn’t been too great over the last 6 months, but I’ve been trying my best to support her over the past 3 years. My partner is understandably very emotional right now, but she’s also very angry and frustrated, and directing a lot of that towards me.
I wondered if anyone else has experienced this kind of anger and frustration being directed at them? How did you deal with it? Do you have any advice on how I can best support her and her mum during this time?
Hello The Goose
Welcome to the Online Community.
I am really sorry to hear that your girlfriend's Mum has lung cancer and that it has spread to her spine.
I understand that this is a difficult time for you all and hope that we can offer you some support that will help. I am glad that you have reached out to us.
Having a diagnosis of cancer naturally is going to put stresses and strains on everyone involved and it is very normal to feel a whole range of emotions. Any pressure already on your relationship with your girlfriend may be amplified by this.
Anger and frustration can be a normal reaction - your girlfriend is possibly feeling angry at the cancer, worried about her Mum and unfortunately sometimes this can mean taking it out on those that we are closest to.
You wanting to provide support will really help but you must also look after yourself. I would suggest that it may be an idea to give the Support Line a call at some point and just talk things through with one of the nurses. There may well be some support in your local area that would help. Many people for example find Maggies centres helpful.
Maggie's | Everyone's home of cancer care
I will pop a link here also to some Macmillan information that I hope may be of help. it has some details about emotional and practical support and where to get help from.
Supporting someone with cancer | Macmillan Cancer Support
I hope that this helps a bit and please do ask if there is anything else you need.
Jane
