Hi all, just looking for a little advice my dad has recently been diagnosed with squamous cell skin cancer and has a very large tumour growing on his stomach which also lies over a large hernia, he had a serious stroke 10 years ago which has left him disabled and took his speech, the surgeons have just told us they cannot operate due to his overall health they said he won’t survive the surgery and that there is no treatment available for him just palliative care, Just over a year ago we suddenly lost my mum who was his carer, I have been told he has only months to live and I don’t know if I should tell him or not, because of his disability he is unable to do a lot and spends his days mostly in front of the TV, with so much time on his hands I’m worried this news will seriously effect his mental health along with still grieving my mum, but I also agree he has the right to know, he lives with live in carers who have advised me as he lives at home & not in a hospital setting they need to know if he wishes to have a DNR in place has anyone been in a situation like this & can offer any advice
Hello Worrieddaughter123
I am Brian, one of the Community Champions here on the online Community. I have just noticed your post has gone unanswered. By me replying it will be "bumped up" to the top of the page and I hope seen and replied to by other members of this group.
I fully understand your question and can see the potential issues in chatting to dad regarding his prognosis. I do think he needs to know and it's finding the right time to have "that" conversation. I think you need to assess every opportunity you are with him and hope the right time opens up.
It might be a good idea to have a chat with our Support Line on 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week) who will also be able to help you.
I wish you well moving forward.
Best wishes - Brian.
Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
Strength, Courage, Faith, Hope, Defiance, VICTORY.
I am a Macmillan volunteer.
