Hi,
Completely blindsided by my mums recent double lung cancer diagnosis, she had 2 melanomas removed from leg 12 years ago & 2 years ago. Specialist doesn't know if it's linked or not and another lump has been located in breast tissue. My mum is 89 & doesn't want anymore treatment or biopsies . At first it seemed to be the right decision but it's left a void & we all feel so helpless now.
Mum has also been diagnosed with vascular dementia for nearly 3 years , Dad died of a massive heart attack 7 years ago and it completely devastated us. I know what's in front of us as a family because my mums father had lung cancer too & its awful to think she's going to suffer like he did.
My sister & I are Mums carers - day to day making her dinner, checking in mornings , tidying house, food shopping, laundry, doctor visits & organising meds the list goes on. We have have help from outside agency carers throughout the day 4 times - my brother won't help & other brother is in England and hardly ever comes over. My sister & I are feeling regularly burnt out at times.
It's so emotionally draining, we have arranged to speak with Dr on Monday about Mums care going forward, it makes me so sad I can't talk about it to husband, its too painful.
Hi Christi33
Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.
I am Steve one of the community champions and my experience with cancer is via my wife who has stable but incurable Leiomyosarcoma so different to your mum though her cancer is also in her lungs.
It must be extra difficult with both the cancer and the vascular dementia combined, it may be worth when you talk to the GP to consider what you might need too - I know how easy it is to get overloaded and then it can be difficult to help ourselves let alone anyone else.
Something I find useful if to look at your feelings when someone has cancer as being able to recognize the emotions and accept them as both normal and valid can help to make them a little less overwhelming.
<<hugs>>
Steve
