Hi, I’m new here. My dad (73) had prostate cancer a few years ago which was treated with radiotherapy. His PSA levels have stayed low. For the past three months he has had worsening urinary issues, back ache and finally nausea/vomiting. He has called the gp multiple times and been to A&E seven times, where they catheterised him (causing him damage, much bleeding etc). Eventually he was referred for a CT scan. At his yearly oncologist check up two weeks ago, the oncologist saw he was clearly suffering and said she would personally contact a urologist. Two days later he was called into hospital with swollen kidneys, requiring bilateral nephrostomy tubes to be fitted. He couldn’t eat for 9 days as they couldn’t get his vomiting under control.
On the first day he was there, he asked a doctor how long the tubes would remain and she said “for the rest of your life because of the cancer spread”. This was the first time we had heard anything about cancer again. After repeatedly asking for clarification and getting no response, my mum and I went to the ward and waited until an urology consultant came. He told us “there’s a large aggressive pelvic mass, it could be prostate cancer recurrence that’s spread to the bladder, or bladder cancer that’s spread to the prostate. There are some spinal lesions as well.”
My dad asked if he needed biopsies and I asked about treatment to slow the progression (surgery, hormone etc) and the urologist said “None of that, it’s best to let nature take its course now, given your age and health”.
My dad is 73 and four months ago we were all enjoying a holiday abroad, going to gigs etc., so for him to just be written off like this feels very unfair. Yes he was acutely unwell in hospital, because his kidneys were poisoning him.
He’s home now, but still has the catheter and nephrostomy tubes in, which he hates as they cause him lots of discomfort and he just wants everything removed. I’ve worked in NHS for 24 years and I am disgusted at this treatment of my dad. I fully accept this is incurable, but to not offer a single thing? Does that seem right?
