Hello all,
I am new to the group even though I have been supporting my partner for 5.5 years now. He was first diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and within a year he had mets showing on his brain. He did trial medication so was actually doing ok for the first couple years. He also had to get targeted radiotherapy for his brain but that went alright. (except having several scary seizures) Over time the trial meds stopped working and he has been bouncing from chemo to chemo with a mix of immunotherapy between all of it. Now 5.5 years in, he has a spot showing in his liver and his bottom vertebrae's. He has chemo every 3 weeks and just had to do all over head radiotherapy beginning of July, because the brain was getting worse. Needless to say it has been a long road. We are only now hitting the major fatigue and chronic pain stage. He is exhausted just to go to the toilet. I took him into the hospital a few weeks ago after his last chemo session cause he was in so much pain. All they can do is pain management and say they can't promise it won't happen again. He is now super scared about it. This feels like we are getting closer to the end. I've never felt so tired in all my life. Does anyone else feel like this? I think I'm super depressed and it feels like it's sucking all my energy out of me. I work full time and then do all the running around and house work and cooking and anything he needs, I'm there. He doesn't like anyone around to see him like this so I don't really get any help. He has finally agreed to have his mom stop by here and there when I'm at work. I can't help but feel guilty or lazy or just annoyed I'm not getting everything done that I want. I literally need to vegg in my pj's all day on Saturdays just to get over my week. I'm not seeing friends and barely speak on the phone. I just cant be bothered cause it exhausts me. I think I'm in a massive rut and don't know how to get myself out of it. Tried to make a doctors appointment last week and they can't get me in. I have to try again this week for next week. But they had no problem upping my sertraline antidepressants. I'm stuck in a low place. Any advice out there??
