My mum has cancer and I am new here..

Oh wow.. I could of wrote this myself. We recently found out my Moms breast cancer has came back (she had it 14 years ago she was 40 at the time) she’s now got stage 4 secondary breast cancer but this time it’s spread to her bones, lymph nodes and lungs. They have told us it’s terminal but they haven’t really given us a timeframe. Her chemo is due to start in the next few weeks. She is so calm about it all, but I’m a complete mess. I can’t sleep with worry and anxiety. I should be trying to be positive for her but I just keeping thinking the worst. We’ve only know for a month and it’s all I think about day and night, you say your mom is 2 years in? I feel like it’s only been a month and I don’t know how things will ever be normal again x

I also feel like I could have written this. My Mum was diagnosed with breast cancer in June 2021 and had surgeries including lymph node removal, chemo and radiotherapies which continued into the early part of this year. We thought things may be on the up but (to cut a long story short) we have just found out there is cancer on her spine. We are awaiting further appointments but expecting for the dreaded rounds of chemo to not be confined to history as we had hoped. I am on holiday at the moment (which I feel guilty about) but I feel like the black cloud is constantly hanging over my entire family, despite everyone’s positivity. I have always suffered with anxiety and in some ways, this outcome is all I have feared since the initial mammogram recall last year. I worry about her, my Dad, my brothers and my elderly Grandma who has already lost a daughter to cancer 5 years ago. Whilst I know there is joy to be found, this all feels very unfair; it feels like it has been a number of years since any of us had any good news and it’s hard to see a time in the future when I will feel true happiness again. Sending my love to everyone on this thread, it is helpful to know that others are struggling with similar feelings. X