How to deal with depression of partner with cancer

Morning, Birch. I am so sorry to hear about your wife and the suffering that she is going through. I know first hand how hard it is to watch someone you love in pain and be unable to help. I lost my husband on Friday evening to bowel cancer. He was in a world of pain - pain crisis was mentioned time and again. Like your wife, he only wanted to be at home. The hospice worked closely with the community nurses and were able to finally get his pain under control at home. It took a while as his medical situation was complex, but believe me if they can control his pain then the pain your wife is in can absolutely be controlled. There are pain patches and syringe drivers which can control pain, among other things - subcut needles, subcutaneous opioid pain relieving tablets etc. The hospice are experts in pain relief. Maybe your wife will allow you to give the hospice a call and they can come out to talk to you both. They are very good at what they do. Have to agree with you 100% on GPs. They did absolutely nothing for my husband other than ask to visit in his final days to tick a box. I was fuming but calmed myself enough to explain how pointless they have now become. I am sorry to know your GP is the same. The hospice and community nurses took care of my husband so well over two years. They genuinely care and are set up for excellent care at home. Wishing you all the best and I truly hope that her pain can be controlled and she will agree to talk to someone. 

Thankyou for your very kind words and my deep sympathy for your loss. Good memories last. Both my daughter and i as well as my wife's sister are discussing Hospice and the consultant oncologist also. I'll keep you informed as or if it develops.  Look after yourself.