Partner referred to palliative care team after diagnosis days ago.

Hi, 

My fiance was diagnosed with stage 4 kidney cancer with lung and lymph also on Wednesday following several trips to A&E during May when he was told it was covid but with a negative covid test, then he was told it was pneumonia and then in June a chest scan accidentally picked up the top of a tumour, further scans then a biopsy and then the news on Weds. He's been in hospital since then as developed an infection and diabetes. We're both in our mid 40's and I have a 13 year old and he has a 20 year old. 

We were due to marry next month but had to rebook for 2021 due to covid and now have no idea what we'll be able to do, can't even marry 'in a hurry' until the registrars give us the go ahead. 

I completely understand when you say your world has broken and I can't give you answers but from what I've seen on here so far I think there's lots of support from caring and understanding people willing to give advice and share experiences. 

xxx

Thank you so much for your reply. I’m so sorry you are going through the same with your partner. It’s such a horrible time. My partner was diagnosed with diabetes in December as well but now we don’t know if it was linked to the cancer or not. His doctors has been pretty shocking, he’s repeatedly phoned over the last few months asking to be seen with the pain he’s been in and they’ve refused to see him. Told him it was just a uti, it wasn’t until he took himself to a and e that it was revealed he has cancer. 
It’s been a tough weekend here with it being Father’s Day as I’m sure it has been for you guys too. Even harder with your partner at hospital. Sending lots of love and strength to you all at this horrible time and keeping fingers crossed for both of us. Always here if you want to chat to offer each other support xx

It's so frustrating isn't it? my OH was told he was "being difficult" when he complained to the practise manager that his GP wasn't making the referrals they promised.  He started seeing them 2-3 years ago, initially for fatigue, then lower back pain in the one side only and more recently breathing difficulties, they ran a blood test which didn't show anything so he was told there were no other tests they could do and he just needed to deal with it! Now we're told it was the first major sign and a scan would have literally saved his life. 

I hope you have some good support nearby but please do feel free to chat here as well. Wishing you all the very best. xx