Pessimistic and no faith!

Your right about the rain though a few sunny spells would help, got your tattoo's well done  and now the wait though should not ne long. Busy day, had bloods, have exercise class-Worksop, yesterdays went much better, meeting my friends from the forum, massage, relaxation-Leeds and cardiologist appointment to finish she has a little good news for me. I don't know what it's called but many of the things i used to do a couple of years ago, and enjoy i have stopped doing, PS nurse who did bloods was an old school friend, he's ben living 3 streets away from me for 40 years and have never bumped into her once, Enjoy your food shop and whatever else you do today.

Eddie xx

Really glad to hear your exercise went well. That's great news. Wow you had a busy day, how did your massage and relaxation go? How was your meeting with the cardiologist? I hope you got the good news you so deserve. I've done lots of things in the past that I've stopped doing. To be honest I believe I've started things that I never wanted to do in the first place, I've felt some sense of obligation to be doing. Now I just take the day as I find it and if I don't want to do anything I won't lol I didn't do anything yesterday as I didn't feel too grand. Not sure why because I feel fine again today. I've got to go and get my PICC line dressing changed. Went on Monday but there was nobody there that could do a PICC line. I believe we are then going to do the shop. That's crazy somebody can live so close and you not bump into them. You wouldn't credit it would you. Hopefully now you will bump into them lol What plans have you for today?

Thank' for the rice pud recipe, massage always nice if you can have a go, relaxation done in a quiet room for the first time so 3 or 4 fell asleep. My cardiologist has told me the deterioration  has not only "stopped" but was slightly less than they first thought, Your right about getting motivated, it does get harder,  did you not ask if hubby can be shown how to look after your PICC line, it was a big help to Sheila and me. A whole hospital and no one can see to it, Blowy but nice here so out for dinner and go from there, hope you get out and enjoy your shop, just think of all the yummy things you can buy, take care.

Eddie xx

Oh that's awesome news from the cardiologist. So, so pleased for you. That's ace.  Glad your massage and relaxation went well too. Relaxation clearly works if peeps are falling asleep lol Well you'll never believe it, went to hospital yesterday to get PICC dressing changed and again nobody to do it. So they sent me to another department and what should have been an half hour job, we were there 4 hours. My PICC lines were blocked and they tried to unblock by injecting them with something. They managed to unblock one but not the other. They said they would try again next week. What a palava lol And as to can Dave do it, they said no lol So we didn't get shopping but had fish and chips in compensation. Not up to much today. I had pain this morning, shit happens. I took some pain relief and it has helped but it has made me rather drowsy. Also waiting on radiotherapy doctor ringing me. How about you? What are you up to?

Helen my cardiologist is great, the whole team are. Not surprised they wouldn't let Dave do it, there's no one up to teaching him, it,' basic nursing. Fish and chips sounds lovely though without the chips for me, Sorry to hear you have been in pain, pain relief must be strong to make you drowsy, though they work which is good, lovely day here, so took poppy for a short walk as chest pain over, took Sheila to Maggies and lunch, been to pharmacy for supplies, got PSA score doubled again, not good, now off for physiotherapy

Morning Eddie and hope you are well. I'm sorry to hear your psa score has doubled. Excuse my ignorance but what does that mean and can you get it back down again? So, radiotherapy doctor rang me. She has changed the plan. She originally said I would have radiotherapy every day for one week. But now she said I will have a larger dose every Thursday for six weeks. I start next Thursday. Well I would like to tell you I'm up and about and out for the day but alas not. I'm not feeling well again, dizzy spells, nausea and feeling faint. I'm not sure why but my suspicion is it's this new pain relief medication they've put me on. It's a nice day as well and don't even feel up to getting out in the garden. Ah well such is. Another day of taking it easy and I shall see what tomorrow brings. How about you? I hope you are well and up to much. Whatever you may be doing, take care and enjoy 

Hi Marie , I'm ok thank you, PSA is a measure of how active your cancer is sort off, as for getting it down, it might go down anyway. The larger dose of RT over 5 or 6 days is becoming a more common treatment It's usually three times the daily dose and is just as effective sorry your not too good again, definitely start with pain meds, there will be alternatives which will suit you better, you do right stopping in when your not feeling good though I hope you are eating and drinking, physio cancelled yesterday so had it this morning and prostate group soon after, the usual by far the youngest and the only terminal. but i did learn one thing, never to go to one again, hope you feel better soon as weekend weather is nice and be good for you to get out, My turn to do family dinner Sunday 14 coming so I am trying to book somewhere, if no luck it will be a picnic, Saturday allotment and sow seeds, take care.

Eddie xx

Hi Marie hope you are feeling a little better today and managed to get out even if it's only to the garden, how are you getting on with the pain meds, have you told the doctor or pharmacist and are you still taking them, I hope Dave is taking good care of you, I'm sure he is. Been to allotment, no seeds sown again, no reason, taking Sheila to peak district later D B&B at favourite pub and meeting friends, just started raining so maybe Sheila won't want to go, Was told yesterday i have CRCC, not treatable as such but possible to manage and adjust to it, suppose it's better than alzheimers, Family dinner Sunday, I always look forward to that, if I remember LOL, take care.

Eddie

Good morning and hope I find you well. I hope that PSA goes down and I hope you manage to stay well. Glad you made your prostrate group but am I right in that you're saying your not going to go to one again, why is that? I hope you didn't have a bad time of it. I can't believe you're having 14 people to dinner today. WOW!!! That will be ace but 14!! Lol Hope you managed to get booked in somewhere, that will be lovely. I hope you managed to get to the peak district yesterday. It's raining here too and it's absolutely throwing it down at the moment. Still, I hope you got to go and had a wonderful time. So. yesterday got up and felt better and took my medication again but within an hour felt dizzy, faint, stumbling over so thought, right, that's it, not taking them again. One of them is Naproxen and I have to take Lansoprazole with Naproxen to prevent a stomach ulcer. Both of them have these side effects. They also gave me Morphine to use as and when but I haven't needed to take that yet. I'll let the Doctor know tomorrow that I have made a decision to stop it, not feeling like that all the time, it's awful. We went to the Peak District yesterday too. We went to the Peak District Wildlife Park and then on to Leek for a pub lunch. It was really good, really enjoyed. Excuse my ignorance again but what is this CRCC? Don't think we're doing much today, I'm tired from yesterday. I will see if daughter wants to cook me a yummy Sunday lunch lol Enjoy your day and take care 

Wow a day in the peak district that's great, we are there now at my favourite pub near ladybower, but off home soon, glad you got out to the wildlife park and a pub lunch as well, you do like your pun lunches, as do i. Naproxen with Lansoprazole  they didn't help me either, 3 Rough days and a trip to A & E put me off them LOL, I took mine for lower back pain, I'm sure you will get alternative pain relief when you talk to your doctor. though i''m glad you have not needed the morphine. Not surprised your tired you go from not doing much to days out, My prescription to you is more trips out to improve four fitness. Enjoy today I'm sur your daughter would love to make you dinner. Prostate group was ok, guest cancer nurse was very nice, but it would be nice to learn something but never did, Booked a table at local Italian so no cooking, yippee, Really need to sow some seeds so off to allotment to sow, will do it in greenhouse so will be toasty. CRCC cancer related cognitive changes, your brain has to work much harder to remember as the usual way it has always done it has been changed due to treatment, It is possible with help your brain can be trained to process information in a different way, though it will never be the same again. take care.

Eddie xx