Hiya.
I know I’m sounding so silly when I say this & should be grateful but I’m so confused at the moment for feeling & looking pretty well, considering!
5 years ago I lost both my breasts to breast cancer & last year (Jan ‘24) I was told I had breast cancer again, metastatic to lymph nodes, bones & liver.
Chemotherapy finished last June & now on Phesgo & Denusonab.
My Oncologist last week told me scan results show that my liver is clear & overall the cancer is stable. She’s reducing my Denusonab frequency as well as visits to see her.
Really, I should be jumping for joy. I was given around 12 - 18 months a year ago. I didn’t think I was even going to see last Christmas.
The fatigue I have is difficult to manage but definitely improving & my pain medication has me functioning well. Oramorph sorts the occasional extra niggle but none of this is what I was expecting. I didn’t know you could improve after a diagnosis like mine. I just assumed my life would be all downhill after the chemo started.
Everyone is commenting on how well I look. My skin is radiant & even my wrinkles have reduced!
It’s crossed my mind that maybe some people don’t actually believe that I even have Cancer.
Some days I think I should be back at work or doing more around the home. My fatigue unfortunately soon brings me back to earth though.
I don’t understand it & now getting myself worked up when I should be grateful & actually enjoying every good day while I can. Many can’t. Is it a false high though? Will I start showing symptoms again worse than before. Will the pain & my decline come back overnight & hit me hard & quick. I know you can’t ever put a time limit on any of this but does it mean I have a good chance of being well enough to enjoy this coming Christmas too.
All I ever heard about was how difficult life is after chemo & I can’t find any info on people feeling better under palliative care.
Has anyone here been the same please? How long was your wellness? (I know everyone is different).
I should be enjoying myself but I feel so guilty.
Hi NGT and a warm welcome to this corner of the Community but sorry to read about the challenges you are having.
The one thing I have learned on my 25 years journey (See my story) is that nothing is certain and fixed in stone…….
I was first diagnosed in 1999 with a very rare, incurable slow growing type of Non Hodgkin’s Lymphoma then in late 2013 a second, also very rare type of aggressive Non Hodgkin’s Lymphoma showed it’s ugly face taking me to stage 4……. The plan that was put in place was seen as a last throw of the dice plan as back in 2013 there was no other options.
If the plan did not work I would have a few years on the clock…… I am now 9+ years past that point in time…….. I still have my incurable NHL asleep at the moment……. and over the past 9 years a few new treatment options have come on line so I now have a fall back if things kick off.
I am very fortunate that I (and my family) am a complete glass half full person……. and will always find the gold in any situation……. Our mind set is that we define how we live…… not my cancer.
Some folks find navigating the post treatment world hard…… our great CNS always reminded us that we definitely have the power to define the future….. we can’t control it but we can define how we live it.
You may find it helpful to make a cuppa and have a look at this great paper After Treatment Finishes - Then What? by Dr Peter Harvey as it highlights the post treatment milestones.
In the early years post treatment we would often have a look through the points in the paper……. do come back with your thoughts once you have had a look at the paper.
I was diagnosed at age 44, our daughters were 14 and 18…… but we went on to see our daughters graduate, get married, set up very successful businesses and provide us with 4 beautiful granddaughters….. I turn 70 at the end of this year and as a family we celebrated 9+ years since my last treatment.
I am continuing to live a great life and we continue to look forward to what else life has in store first us to enjoy…….. even in the storm life can still be lived and enjoyed ((hugs))
