I am now cancer free after breast cancer in 2011 and thyroid cancer in 2017 and a recurrence in 2022.
Having a cancer diagnosis is really traumatic, once you get through it you are a different person to the person you were before your cancer diagnosis.
Myself I suffer from anxiety and depression.
There is always the worry that you may have another recurrence. Family and friends who haven't been through it are no help.
I have got used to comments like be positive etc etc.
In 2018 I relocated from an area I had lived most of my life because of emotional blackmail.
My mother was poorly I was bequeathed a property left by a family member, so I really felt I had to move to support my mother.
This caused the end of a long term relationship because my partner after I had made the decision to move changed his mind.
Then my mother passed away six months after I moved.
For the last six years I have supported my father through his bereavement.
Bring an ex nurse I have cared for him physically and mentally.
During this time my daughter has had two children. I haven't been able to be with her for the birth etc because it was too difficult to get away.
She used to be able to come and stay at my father's place, but now can't, because my brother and sister in law moved in with my father.
My place is too small to put her and the children up, and she can't put me up because she doesn't have the room.
It's costing both of us a lot of money to visit each other, because we have to pay the travel and overnight costs to stay somewhere.
I desperately want to move back closer to my daughter.
But my father and brother don't want me to go until he has passed away. He is nearly 91.
So he could live a few more years. I feel that I am just waiting for him to pass away before I can live the rest of my life.
When I mention that I could go before him with my history of cancer. I am told to stop being negative etc and that my father needs me.
I feel that no one is here for me, when I am ill I have to get on with it. Go to appointments and surgery on my own.
I had major surgery on my hip 8 months ago, but had to go into a care home to rehabilitate. I had to pay someone to look after my dog.( My sister in-laws daughter has a dog who they both have dog sat for and walked, but won't do it for me).
II have recently been really ill with COVID still I'll now a month later. But no physical help from anyone!!
So I have had enough of the three of them and their selfishness.
I have had the property valued and it's going on the market next week.
I haven't told them yet, because I know they will try their upmost to persuade me not to go.
I am actually scared to tell them because they will try and make me feel guilty.
But this last bout of Covid, really made me feel alone, and I was so ill I thought I wasn't going to survive.
I apologize to anyone reading this that it's become a short story, but I desperately need to share this.
