Emotional support

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Hi

Hello, I'm new to the group, I am 58, live in Sheffield, a mum to 3 grown up boys and nannan to one granddaughter.

I had treatment 11 years ago and have suffered emotionally ever since. I live in fear that it will return. Do other people feel this way? Recently I saw a GP who sent a referral in for me to be examined at gynecology within 2 weeks. The GP said, I understand why you worry because for a lot of people cancer does return!!! I've been seen and all clear but having these check ups never stops me worrying. Do others feel the same?

  • Hi Bubblesnan welcome to the forum and I am so very sorry to hear how you are feeling. Its certainly not a nice place to be and to answer your question " do other people feel this way"-- indeed they do and more than you think.

    I think we are forever changed as a person after Cancer some things don't faze us anymore and other things just give us cause to worry and that's ok. I think  most of us will relate to what you are feeling and why. I don't think we are ever totally free of "what ifs" but the issue there is that it starts to rule our lives and then Cancer wins.  Don't let Cancer win as it has taken enough time from you with worrying so time to try to put some of this behind you but always be vigilant and that's always ok.

    I'm wondering, even at this time if a paper, written by a Psychologist called  "After Treatment Finishes: What next? It was written by Dr Peter Harvey and you can look this up on the internet and Ill bet that you recognise yourself in there. Its a good paper and i think it  will help you to answer those questions you have and also hopefully know from that that you are not alone in this.

    Sending some huge big hugs your way for now. xx    

    gail

     
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  • Thank you, I'll look for the paper online. You've been really helpful.

  • This is the link to the paper After Treatment Finishes - Then What?by Dr Peter Harvey as it highlights the post treatment milestones.

    Mike (Thehighlander)

    It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

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  •   my friend Gail  is spot on. We can’t let the thought of Cancer coming along define your life……. you need to take control and you need to define life.

    The paper helps identify the stepping stone to do this. I was diagnosed way back in 1999 with an incurable but treatable rare blood cancer…….. for the first 16 odd years I only ever had partial remission the longest being 9 months before going back into treatment…… I could have given up, I could have lost all hope…….. but on 19 Sep that will be my 7th anniversary of being told I was in remission….. I was diagnosed when I was 44…….. and I will turn 68 in Nov and I am living a great life…… the ‘what if’s?’ are on a very high shelf collecting dust….. 

    Yes bumps com along, I have had lots of health issues over the post few years and it could have been easy to go straight the the C word….. but health stuff happens cancer or not.

    Do come back to us with your thoughts about the paper.

    Mike (Thehighlander)

    It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

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  • Thanks Higllander you are a star as always.x

    gail

     
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  • Been away all day doing some hill walking up above Ullapool so on catch up.

    Mike (Thehighlander)

    It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

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  • Yes, we all live in fear that cancer will return. In my case it did after 14 years - not surprisingly I thought I'd got away with it! After treatnent I'm now 4 months into remission again. I've been worrying that it will come back, but I now know I need to let go of that. The paper by Peter Harvey was a revelation to me, I can't recommend it highly enough.