Hi Maeen and welcome to this corner of the community.
So great that this is not a second cancer but I can totally understand the trauma of having to be checked out, this will obviously transport you back to the dark days of the past, it is only natural.
I was diagnosed way back in 1999 with a rare incurable type of blood cancer and regardless what we threw at it kept coming back so my longest partial remission was about 9 months before I had to go back in treatment….. after 14 years my condition became very aggressive so the treatments had to become just as aggressive…… my last treatment was Oct 2015 and remission was eventually confirmed in Sep 2016.
I have not had the visible life changing treatment you have had, my changes and challenges are invisible and none one can see what the challenges look like…….. but as best as I can my family and I aim to define how we live life rather than letting my incurable cancer define us…… yes it can wake-up but our plan is deal with that if and when it does….. but in the meantime we are not wasting any of our freedom.
These bumps n the road need to be navigated and the best way is to get some help….. if you don’t you lose and the ‘what if’s?’ win.
Some suggestions:
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
The Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provide practical information, emotional support or just a listening ear.
Macmillan have also teamed up with Bupa to offer up to 6 free counselling sessions for people struggling emotionally because they are living with cancer. Clicking on the link will give you more information about this.
You may also find it helpful to make a cuppa and have a look at this great paper After Treatment Finishes - Then What? by Dr Peter Harvey as it highlights the post treatment milestones.
Always around to chat stuff through or just to listen.
