I just want to be me

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Hi.   My story so far I am 31 was diagnosed with womb cancer grade 2 stage 1a 6weeks post op. I just carnt get back to ‘normal’ I carnt stop thinking about cancer it’s taken over my brain I can spend house googling symptoms that I think I have got the strange thing is my diagnosis as found by accident.my ovaries was kept in as am only young this terrifies me I have no check ups afterwards I just phone my cns if I think there is a problem!! I have joined the womb cancer forum the ladies on there are lovley. How do I just be me again be the happy mum to my kids? The normal friend sister partner! With always being natalie with cancer my Journey was so fast 4 weeks from diagnosis so surgery so I should be happy about that shouldn’t I ? But am not. The thought of this coming back Or they have missed something on my scans or the cells had already went threw womb. It’s a strange feeling all this sorry for the rant my family friends just don’t understand they was there when I had my surgey but now they think that it’s gone now so all back to normal! Xxx