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Hi Nadia
Yes shocks me too at how many people post on this forum and are affected by cancer themselves or have a family member. I thought it would be a lot but not this many and what about those who don't know about this site or just choose not to post.
Its great that your Dad is trying to carry on as normal and still working. Only advice I have is don't take anything for granted especially time as you never know how long you have with them. Tell your Dad you love him.
Cancer is so cruel and it took my lovely little mum away 6 weeks ago and I will never forget what she went through - love you mum.
xx

hi

thanks for the reply, your right it is a very cruel disease and it has a mind of its own!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am still clinging onto the hope for a miracle cure for all cancer patients however, I doubt that will happen anytime soon. I am sorry to hear about your mum, did she know the extent of her cancer?

xx

Hi everyone, i'm new so i'm sorry if im putting this in the wrong place. i'm looking for your sage advice! my dad, who is 75, was diagnosed with terminal metastatic lung cancer in feb. i am one of his three daughters, although the other two live quite far away, one in america. I am my dads main carer although he has carers in everyday. (I am also employed as a home carer myself). 3weeks ago he fell and broke his shoulder and has been in hospital since. he will be coming out next week but in the 3 weeks he has been in things have really gone down hill. he is now to be hoisted ect and its clear that he will be coming home to die. he deals with this really well, in complete denial. i am not so coping so easy and this is now beginning to show. i cant talk to friends and especially not to family as since my mum passed away 2 years ago i have taken on her role as the strong one who is supposed to be the rock and center that the others can come too. sometimes i feel that this has come too early for me, im 32, and have 2 younger sisters to "be there" for. my doctor has diagnosed stress " surprise surprise" and given me a battery of things to try which are all "yeah right, when i have time put them on my to do list!" I dont mean to sound ungrateful, i know thats all they can suggest but i thought it may help if i gathered advice from others who understand my situation and can tell me what worked for them. hence why i am here. so please, let me know what works for you and what you found helpful, even if its only eat a tub of icecream till you're sick!

Hello, just wanted to say that you are in such a great place for support, you can come on here and rant and rave and know that you are somewhere that folks understand what you are going through! But I am sorry your Dad is so poorly at the moment.....I hope that before he is sent home, you have an OT assessment so you know everything is in place to help (used to be an OT myself before retiring so know how important this is!) Do make sure you too have a method of getting help as this journey is hard.....counselling might help, and do keep in close touch with your sisters to make sure they understand and can come to see him even if for the one in the USA it's to say goodbye......((((((((((((hugs))))))))) for you to help, do keep posting, you might find it helpful to join a lung cancer thread, check it out on the left of your screen, where it says 'tags'

hi im a newbie
my dad 4 weeks ago was diagnosed 4 weeks ago with terminal bowel cancer, i would like to know how they stage this. i feel my parents are holding back from me and i need to no to settle it in my own mind

hello, try clicking on the cancer tags at the lef hand side of the page, it will take you to others in a similar situation, or going to the top of the page to the cancer backup site where you will be able to access the info yourself just type it in at the top, best wishes jackie x

Hi all!
I am totally new to all of this, so bear with me if i ramble on,
my mum is 70 and was diagnosed with lung cancer in Feb this year, apparantly it is a rare form usually associated with people working with Asbestos. Funny thing is that she has worked for the last 30 odd years in hospitals both NHS and Private. However in recent conversations she has said that she used to work a machine that cleaned the needles using ethylene oxide and having looked EO up it does say that it can cause cancer and birth abnormalities. mum also told me that she was the only one that could use it and that they stopped using it as it was proven that it could cause cancer.
they told mum at the beginning that it wasn't curable but she could have chemotherapy to hopefully slow it down, she started the treatment in may this year and had two lots and then had a ct scan the week before the next lot was due and now they have told her that one of the lesions has grown 2cms and two more lesions have come and they have stopped the chemo and told her that they have stopped it to give her a quality of life for what she has left, but they wouldn't tell her there and then how long they think she has got
she has to go back to the hospital on 7th sept, they have offered her another chemo but apparently its not a nice one and she isn;t going to have it, she lives on her own and my sister goes in every day, my other sister goes when she can and i live in devon whereas my mum lives in nottingham and i am mum to three special needs kids so i cannot get up to her as much as i want to.
her breathing is getting bad because the lesions are growing on her (sorry not sure what they called) what i call her breathing tubes and they won't operate because the lesions are near to her heart.
she lost her hair after the first chemo and she won't wear her wig or her bandanna's because her head sweats so much, so therefore none of us can even get to go out for a ride in the car.
sorry if i rambling i have so much going on in my head
x

dear nannydi, im so sorry that you are in this situation, with your mum, i assume as you cant get there as often that you ring her as much as you can? it is very difficult, and having 3 special needs children makes i harder for you, the only thing i can say is be there on the end of the phone when she needs you, as much as you can, theres nothing more you can do, thinking of you jackie x

yes i ring her about three four times a day, it don't make it any easier though does it? i want to be with her but i live 210 miles away, i suppose part of me feels guilty because i can't give my sister a regular break and help her with mum. my travelling up north has to be planned with military precision, which couldn't happen without the support of my hubby and step daughters, one of which gets married on 5th sept and i feel bad cos she is worried about my mum above being excited about her wedding!

Hello and welcome to this site, although I really wish you did not need to be here. So many of us are affected by cancer, either as patients, carers, relatives and friends and it's scary just how many people are in this situation.

May I bring your attention to your profile here. It will be so much easier for others here to help and make the correct response to you and your problem if you complete your profile and make it open for all to see. When it is witheld it is quite difficult for those of us who've been here for some time to know quite how to respond to those of you who've witheld your profile details. I know it can be confusing, but Mac will always guide you through how to make you profile visible to everyone - or even mark it as only available to friends. That way, we can request you as a friend, read your profile and decide how best we may help. When I first joined this site I did not realise what a big difference it would make to allow my profile to be read.

The last thing I want to share with you is that, if I'd not had access to this site and been able to make friends and obtain advice, I don't know how I'd have coped over the last two years. Please open your profiles and let us help - if we can. Sometimes all we can do is to exchange experiences, but that in itself helps.

Very best of wishes, Rosemary