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Thanks Peggysue for yr helpful reply. I'm Jayne, 47, 2 great children, a daughter of 15 and son of 20. My husband Jim, who's 54, was diagnosed with advanced small cell lung cancer with neck node and liver mets last February. He's had chemotherapy and radiotherapy which he responded well to. However, in May this year, I found him semi-conscious in bed, he was admitted to hospital and a ct scan showed a tumour in the frontal lobe of his brain. No warning signs - so sudden! I am now his carer and as an ex-nurse am coping as best as I can. Any advice from anyone in the same/similar situation wld be great. Many thanks. XXX

Marianna
I was so sorry to read your post and see what you are going through. Life really sucks sometimes doesn't it? You have obviously already been through a lot with your mum, and its not in the least surprising that you now need help. Many of us are more private than others, and I know it must have taken a lot for you to open up with your fears, and I really do feel for you. You are very young to be going through all of this and it is only natural that you dont want to lose your mum. I am so sorry. I was 23 (very long time ago!) when I lost my mum to cancer, so I do understand some of what you are feeling. Unfortunately I cant help you with the type of cancer, so you may benefit more by joining one of the Brain Tumour threads. "We talk brain tumours" is usually somewhere near the top of the General board and also Glioblastoma Why?, but if you cant see them look under Tags at left hand side of page. If Brain isn't showing, click on the green Tags and use the search box. I hope you can find some comfort and support on here
Love n Hugs Barb x x

Thank you for your replies. I spoke to my husband and he is now on his way to hospital with my f-in-l. I hope this at least gives him some relief. Dear Marianna Iwas so sorry to hear your news. There is nothing anyone can say to make your pain better. I do understand how you feel. My mum was my world too and I believe that at 37 I was also too young to lose her. Hold her hand all the way and always remind her how much you love her and how important she is in your life. That can never be taken away from you. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Hi everyone,

Where do i start, my mum was diagnosed last June 08 with non operable small cell lung grade 3 and had radiotherapy. January this year she was diagnosed with secondary brain full fontal after having a stroke. Terminal and non operative and was put on high dose of steroids. April she had another stroke and doctors said that they doubted if she would leave hospital. She is a home and able to walk and do gently activities. They have her on a ticking over steroid very low dose. She has complete change of personality at times and always takes everything out on my dad. Sometimes he can't even speak without her giving him the evil eye. Poor dad takes it so personal and i keep telling him it not really her talking its the cancer. I suppose i just want an idea of how long. This minimal dose surely cant last too long given that the high dose last time lasted 4 months. She has lost lots of weight on arms and legs but not the stomach. She been feeling tired of late and headaches are worse although my mum wont say exactly how bad they are. If anyone phones her up she tell them that shes Fine. Everyday is just a nightmare wondering if todays the day. Its just awful and i just cant imagine life without my mum.. Being an only child i feel part of me will go with her. There isnt a moment in my day i dont think of her. I know no one can give me a time, i suppose with a holiday approaching which was booked last year i worry i wont be there for her. Any advice would be gratefully received. x

dear chumley, im so sorry about your mum, everyone is different, the best advice i can give you, is if you can speak to the oncologist or gp or macmillan nurse, they will be able to help you more with your questions, you can contact macmillan by going to the home page, it might help put your mind at ease a bit, my best wishes jackie x

My 81 year old mother was diagnosed with cancer of the gullet in January. I am finding it very hard to see her deteriorate by the week (I live 100 miles away from her and travel to spend the weekend with her) but probably the hardest thing is allowing her to cope with her illness in her own way. I would be more proactive on her behalf but she is of a generation which puts up with things and is more passive than I think I would be in a similar situation. She doesn't want to bother people. She had a stent fitted in February and this knocked the stuffing out of her and she has never really regained the ground she lost although it has helped her to eat and she is still managing that not too badly, but has lost a lot of weight. She used to be extremely sharp mentally - always doing crosswords and with a phenomenal memeory - but she has very little concentration, is confused and sleeps whenever she sits down. When I am driving home I often wonder what she is really feeling and if she is still enjoying her life at all. That she may not have long left has never been discussed although she was told at the outset that the tumour was big and that the only treatment would be palliative radiotherapay. She had that in May but there was no suggestion that any investigation would be done to find out if that had helped.Her oncologist said that his aim was to give her quality of life. Sometimes I feel that the whole thing is cloaked in mystery and that Mum will go and we will never really have got to grips with the cancer. I'm sorry that this is a bit of ramble. This is my first time on this site. I wonder if what I have said rings any bells with other people? Linda

Hello, Linda and welcome to a site that will be able to support you on this journey you are on, I'm sorry that I have little to offer except a complete understanding of a period when as you say, there is unquestioning belief and observance of 'the Doctor'. My parents were of that generation too, and my Mother wouldn't allow my Dad to be told of his cancer, though we are sure he knew and that he was dying.

One's parents have been there all our lives and we somehow expect them always to be here, even when we know it to be impossible! You have too, a distance to visit whenever you go to see your Mum, tough to cope with that journey, even worse to leave her too, and drive home again......My love and a hug for you, do keep posting........

Hello Dear Friends,

I have been diagnosed with cancer 3 times in the last 12 months. I think they are all separate cancers but there is just a thought that there may be a connection. First I was diagnosed with Basal Cell Carcinoma (Rodent Ulcer). This was on the end of my nose and was removed by surgery.



Some months later I saw blood in my urine and was diagnosed with what I was told was a 'low grade cancer' that grew like a cauliflower. It was removed or at least burned away and six months later was done again.



Within the last month I have been diagnosed with a fungating tumour of the bowel. That was with a boweloscopy and I am still waiting for the results of a CT scan and MRI scan.



My question, is there likely to be a connection between any of these cancers? I am thinking particularly of the Basal Cell (Rodent Ulcer) and the bowel cancer but I have been given to understand also that the bladder and the bowel cancer are like cauliflowers in shape.



I am not worried about these, I know the hospital will do all they can and I am happy to leave it there but as I said I am interested to know if there is a possibility of any of them being connected.



Contented

Hello Dear Friends,

I have been diagnosed with cancer 3 times in the last 12 months. I think they are all separate cancers but there is just a thought that there may be a connection. First I was diagnosed with Basal Cell Carcinoma (Rodent Ulcer). This was on the end of my nose and was removed by surgery.



Some months later I saw blood in my urine and was diagnosed with what I was told was a 'low grade cancer' that grew like a cauliflower. It was removed or at least burned away and six months later was done again.



Within the last month I have been diagnosed with a fungating tumour of the bowel. That was with a boweloscopy and I am still waiting for the results of a CT scan and MRI scan.



My question, is there likely to be a connection between any of these cancers? I am thinking particularly of the Basal Cell (Rodent Ulcer) and the bowel cancer but I have been given to understand also that the bladder and the bowel cancer are like cauliflowers in shape.



I am not worried about these, I know the hospital will do all they can and I am happy to leave it there but as I said I am interested to know if there is a possibility of any of them being connected.



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