hi susan and amanda, been having problems posting on the other post so thought i would carry on here and see if it works!! how has your weekend been? susan do things feel a little easier for you this year or not really? i feel so sorry for you having all those people around you last year when i bet all you wanted to do was run didnt you? its awful with christmas coming isnt it i even go shopping online as to not have to go shopping with all the xmas things about. i feel so selfish and bitter at the moment and dont want to, i can hear my mum saying come on karen dont be like that but its hard isnt it. i feel so lonely tonight i just want to talk and have a cuddle and a kiss with my mum, sometimes it really hits even harder doesnt it? speak to you both soon, and hope you are bearing up. we all need each other dont we? my love and thoughts are with you love karen xxxxx
as i said to louise it was a strange day yesterday, it was my birthday (the big 40) i kept waiting for a card from mum and dad it was a very strange feeling, its horrible isnt it as its another thing that lets you know that there not here.
i hope you have a good day at work.
hope all your family are well. will let you know how counselling goes later today.
have a good day, speak soon, take care, lots of love and hugs karen xxx
Happy Birthday for yesterday - sorry it's belated. I'm sure it was not quite as you would have hoped but your mum and dad would have been by your side, I imagine feeling as sad as you were that you could not all be physically together. As you say yet another reminder (as if we needed any!)
I need to dash now, but just wanted to say that I will be thinking of you and wishing you the strength and courage you need both before you go and afterwards.
Look after yourself and let us know how you get on, we'll be here waiting to hear from you whenever you're ready.
Love and a special hig to help you on your way (())
i know what you mean about photos, i have loads of mum and dad, but also there are a few just before they passed away, and obviously they look very poorly, i keep them away too but have to look at them now and again, and its heart wrenching isnt it?
anyway i hope you have a good week, speak soon, love and hugs karen xxx
How are you getting on this week? Good to hear that you did get out and about over the weekend, that would have really pleased your mum and dad and you most certainly must not feel strange about doing it. The last thing they would have wanted would be for to you to stay home all the time and the really positive thing is that you made the effort and I think that you need to recognise that as a good move - enough if you don;t feeling like going next time and you stay home- you did it this time!
I though it was really thoughtful of you today sending the message so early to Karen and I'm sure she appreciated it. You will be able to share your expereinces and that will be good for both of you. When is your next session and do you feel any different about the last one now that some time has passed?
I was thinking about you at the cemetary and imagining that before long all the new shoots from the bulbs will be appearing and Spring will be on it's way - I'm sure it will then be possible to spend more time there and if I could do that I would take the opportunity.
So I'll wish you a good week and I'll look forward to hearing from you,
Good to hear from you. I really appreciate you always taking the time to reply. You must be so busy, working and looking after a family too. As I’ve said before, I so wish I’d taken part in this forum before. It’s such a comfort knowing that you’re there to chat to and understand what these feelings inside are like. They just seem to take over sometimes.
How is your week going? Busy I bet. Work does help take your mind off things for a little while though, doesn’t it? I really enjoy my job and get a lot of satisfaction working with children. I would say I’m a pretty conscientious person but since Mum died I seem unable to concentrate for long spells and never appear to be as organised for my class as I would wish. I’m sure they’re still learning despite me though. As I keep reminding myself, at least I’ve made it back!
I don’t have counselling till the 24th-really apprehensive after the last time. You didn’t go to counselling, did you Susan? I got a phone call yesterday saying that a space had become available and I could now go weekly if I wanted. She thinks I would benefit more from that. However, it would only be for an hour and because I go once a fortnight at the moment, I get two hours. It’s also awkward for everyone at work when I need time off. Anyway, I have to think about it and let her know next time. I hope Karen got on OK. As you say, it will be good to be able to share experiences with her.
I hope your husband and son are well. Don’t work too hard!! Will speak to you soon.
Good to hear from you - now how are you this week? I'm not sure you've told me how you are and how you are feeling. Funnily enough I often find myself not concentrating as much as I did, but then, so much has changed in my life and at the end of the day my work has been a great benefit for me and everyone has been understanding in terms of allowing me space and really whatever time I needed.
I didn't go to counselling myself, I'm not sure now whether that was a good idea or not but to be honest I really could not face it. But on reflection, maybe it would have helped, I can honestly say that meeting people here and being able to talk about how I feel has been very helpful and I have made so many friends (thank-you!)
I think it's a good idea to think about what timings (wwekly or fortnightly) would suit you best, I suppose there are benefits and limitations of both. I know it's difficult now not to think about everybody else but at the moment you need to think about your needs and after all in the whole scheme of things I'm sure nobody minds you having a bi tof time off - everybody needs to at sometime for whatever reason.
I think you're sounding a tiny bit brighter - I hope so and I hope the rest of the week goes well for you,
hope you are having a good week, and that your hubby and son are ok.
was very apprehensive about counselling yesterday nearly didnt go, but in the end i did, it was a bit easier this time and she made alot of sense what she was saying so hopefully it will be beneficial in the long run, i know what you mean about not being able to face going as it is very hard indeed, sometimes i feel being on here with all you lovely people is a sort of counselling isnt it? and i have made some good friends with you all even though we havent met speaking to each other is wonderful.
how are you doing susan? i think this a funny month as this time last year is when mum was ill and started all her treatment etc.,
i do hope you have a good week, speak soon, lots of love and hugs karen xxx
i just said to susan counselling was a bit better yesterday maybe cos i was having a bit better day, they do delve into a lot though dont they? but she is very nice. but it is very hard work going as you know yourself.
it is lovely to be able to come here and speak with you all i consider you all my good friends even though we havent met, i appreciate all of your messages and support, i feel i dont support anyone i just moan about whats happened, i dont mean to its just so hard when you lose your main people in your life isnt it?
well i hope you have a good week louise speak soon, lots of love and hugs karen xxx
