Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Hi Karen..hope you've had a good weekend, how was your night out last night? see that chickie Kate got the footy digs in early eh? told her to watch and learn as early days yet, we'll both be smiling come the end of season (fingers crossed lol!) xxxx
Hi Sheilley...said you'd soon be 'happy bunny' again, that's great news...hope all works out babe xxxx
Hi Tereasa,Karen ,Heather,Shelley and Shell Aww Kate,sounds like your stepdad acting weird at mo,soo unfair to you,think you goin on hols soon? sounds like you need to get away, sure people have to move on,but that usually takes time and not in front of your face like that,how,d tour mums friend react? xx
