Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
At least its a hover and not a hoover. Cannot stand vacuum cleaners. Usually being used when you are trying to watch telly and yu have to move your feet and all that bother...xx
Yes Shezz, The little fellow is currently changing from having a morning and afternoon sleep to having one midday one. This is quite a tricky thing to organize. We had a big birthday bash for him yesterday in the Park. All his little mates were there and the barbie was in full use plus plenty of the bubbly stuff. Just trying to regroup for getting back into a normal pattern of day. If I suddenly dissapear it is because he has woke from that midday sleep and I am back to talking childlike gibberish, which is only mildly less intelligible than normal.. Time you were tucked up and snoozing.. xxx
Ahh bless. Hes a lucky little fella to have a grandpa like you yup should b in bed, body clock totally up the shoot.........mind workin overtime...........gonna see my dad tomorrow so will try and get some shuteye!..love to you shez xx
