Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Hey Helen Moomy just jestin mate man u always turn me into a monster footie yob, Im slurping PG tips, thanks for your message today mate, ive picked up somewhat thanks to you all, took dB out and about in a wheelchair she was a bit fed up
Hope everyone is okay, and dealing with everyday life the best they posssibly can. Sorry i havn't been on for a while, i just havn't had the time. I have read through the threads and i am sorry for those who are suffering. Mel i am sorry you have been having so much trouble with your teeth, i know what you mean about DENTIST's i havn't been for 3 years and now i have a hole in my tooth, i have an appoitment next week, i will ahve to take a diazapm before i go i hate it. How is Darryl? i hope he is okay and resting!!. My dad went to see the Dr last week at the hospital his bone scan and x ray wern't back, but she had a quick look at it and she said she's no bone specilaist but it dosn't look like anything sinister, which i took as good news, because surely she wouldn't of said that!!. My dad has still been in pain, but now his radiotheraphy's finished he isn't walking anywhere to bulid his muscles up. He has lost all his hair again which depressed him, he is very tired and not eating, so we are giving him build up drinks....And also suffering from dry moth, apparantly it's all part of the treatment.(God he's certianly been through it) He has to go back to see the Dr at the hospital in a month. (Which i think is a bit toooooo long) Then a scan will be re-arranged. I hope it goes well at the hospiatl tomorrow my fingers are xxxxx for you.
I am sorry if i have rabbled on toooooooo much, but i havn't been on her for a while. Love to you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Love Jacq xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey jacqs Nice to hear from you chikky, you aint ramblin, jees what a tough time your Dad and you are goin thru, we are here for ya ok? brave bird lol Chin up Kate xxxxxxxxxxxx Hens, Chikkies , Roosters etc etc xxxxxxxxxx
Jacq, we were only chatting yesterday about daughter's Radio, she said she started it thinking 'this is peanuts compared to the chemo' but by the end of her 3 weeks said 'whoa, this is exhausting!', and so it was, so your poor Dad must feel shattered, bless him, and it's early days after all that treatment, he'll need time to pick up.....love to you and your Dad.....
im struggling to c the letters, isnt it just like the bloody thing, keiths up, watching, hes normally a bed, sorrry geordie speak, hes normally in bed, giving me EVILS, he is,he hates me drinking but av started so i'll finish ( the rest of the cans!) karen is the computer still taking a paddy? lots of love father jack (helly) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Dear Mother Hen Mel, was thinking of you all today, how did Daryll get on today? hope good news and I hope you are feeling ok and Kirsty, Dan and Daley?! Wasnt allowed up to see Michaela again today as her her neutrophils have dropped again but sweating this sod out so if not tomorrow will be up there on thursday, they are given her a 'growth factor'?? which will help build up and regenerate her bone marrow which in time will make her WBC and neutrophils rise in the hope of making her recover sooner and be well enough to have her 2nd course of chemo next tuesday, if her levels have risen by fri/sat they may let her home the weekend YIPPEE!! miss seeing her so much and she told her step nan today how much she misses her mum, breaks my heart not being with her, anyway darling mother hen mel hope all is ok and have you managed to sort out a dentist yet and how the cigs going?, lots of love and hugs and firemen with the choccy hoses (sorry) big hoses, though both might be nice actually lol!! hope to speak soon T XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Dearest Kate, how was DB today hope feeling better, any news honey? and hope you feeling ok and your dad too? What's this about MANCCY INTERBREDS??!! is it a jealousy thing though looks like we'll now be playng either Liverpool or Chelsea in the final ha ha, shame we can't all get together for it but don't think me and Karen will worry too much about the result!!
Lots of love babe XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Hi karen Babe
What a result?!!! ha ha bring it on with Chelsea or Liverpool! how you feeling today, hope better, did you go to the dr's today? Hope you, Will and your boys are ok, couldnt get to see my babe again today as cold sweating itself out so hopefully tomorrow or thursday, then if she still in am going to stay with her as she keep phoning me today saying how much she misses me (likewise) and both keep getting upset, hope you feeling better, lots of love teresa xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi moomy hope you are ok, did you manage to get a bit of sunshine this afternoon? hope your family and Caz are ok, did you get your 3-course meal and bottle of vino...still waiting for mine, phaps juls's wages cheque bounced!!! love and hugs Teresa XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Hi helly, hope you and keith are ok, glad he feeling well and awake!! loved the 'yellow snow' crack, I've met a few hairdressers like that where I'd like to do more than wish they eat yellow snow...lol, Take care honey love and hugs Teresa XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Hi Kate Thanks for replying, It's great to know there is lovely peeps to talk to. Yes my dad is certianly going through it, but i must not be selfish because there is more people struggling at the moment aswell. My thoughts are with you aswell Kate. xx
Hi Moomy Thanks for your reply, sorry i have a brain like a sieve but i can't remember speaking to you yesterday!!. Yes i agree i though my dad was sailing through the radio, but wrong there, the side effects are starting to show. My thoughts are with you, and your daughter....
