Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Hi Karen I'm still here, my screen didn't refresh so I thought the conversation had just got stuck.
How are you today?
You have probably read that Richard has not been too good since his car cleaning escapades! No where near as serious as Darryl was the other evening, but yesterday he had me worried as he was just so very cold and shivery despite layers and blanket. This ruddy chemo lark is wearing thin!!
Promotion indeed,about time too because no-one could surrogate as good as you you are very special and i'll tell you why because your hear for every one whether they laugh or cry a big heart you have which you share to us all and your always there when i give you a call
thankyou for being you and thakyou for being their for me
PS: Hope thave give you a pay rise lol,
lots of love and hugs love chickie tortoise kim XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Hi Juls, i forgot to tell you that Darryl has been really cold since starting radio. Maybe all these chemicals running through their body eh? He has really cold feet and put them on me when we were in bed last night!!! Little sod i jumped out of bed they were like a freezer!! Haven't moved that quick in a long time!! lol love an hugs mother hen mel xxx P.S what drink you having as i'm not drinking alone???? lol
was just catching up with the posts before i arrived, sorry poor richard not been feeling too good bless him, these treatments although great, side effects can be awful eh mate? send him a gentle hug from me!!
Deputy Karen, what a little piggy you being tonight!! lol Save some of that rum for me! That was so sweet what our tortoise chickie Kim said about you, but very very true! I couldn't have said it better my self! Love an hugs ooohhhh were's me nuts???? lol mother hen mel xxxxxx
