Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
HI Mother Hen Mellymoo I think she's asleep just now or finishing off her hay.
She's my baby andb boy is she moulting right now jeeezzz! Snow storm time! No matter how much I brush more loosens!
Yes I am proud of Gemma's achievements and how committed she is to her horses and her job, which is also her hobby and her life. As I said earlier, the yard she manages is livery, breeds Australian stock horses for Polo and polocrosse, starts off and trains youngsters, is a competition base for the Kent polocrosse team which she also plays in as well as teaches. Currently there are 45 -50 horses based on her yard. So hse is unbelievably busy, but as I said it's her life.
Hi deputy Karen, darryl is loads better thanks. I think we have the meds sorted now. I give him anti sickness and painkillers 4 hours before radio then as soon as he's had radio i give him more painkillers and anti sickness tabs(i take them to the hospital so he can take them there) then when we get home i give him them every four hours. He's also back on steroids i forgot to say but thankfully not as many as before as they make him really anxious, only has to have 2 a day now where before he was on 8 a day. When radio finished we have to go for check ups ct scans chest xrays and bloods every 6 weeks so at last darryl gets a bit of a break from hospital !! he said it will be nice to be 'normal' for a while! bless him. I have my ECG and see the cardiologist on friday at 10.45am got to have that tredmill test too so have to get fit before then!! lol I may also have to have a angiogram to look at the arteries in my heart if ECG not good but cross that bridge if and when i come to it. My main concern at the moment is to get Darryl through the radio. It was good to hear from Teresa again today and even better that our Michaela is eating so well. Darryl was the same on chemo he put on a stone!!! I do miss having her on here though but hopefully she will be back on line soon. love an hugs mother hen mel xxx
Hi Juls, I remember all the grooming!!! All that winter coat what a nightmare!! lol I loved groomimg though really, so if you ever need a hand i'm your girl! lol Your daughter has done so well and glad that she is making you proud of her. I wish sometimes i was still with the horses but thats life eh! They certainly are less problematic than kids sometimes!!! lol I've never played polo but used to go to shows with our ponies and won quite a few clear rounds and the gymkana's Fun happy times. love an hugs mother hen mel xxx
well my deputy an chickies!! What shall we munch on tonight???? I feel a choccy fireman coming on!!! lol Where's me hose!!! lol or maybe we all have a little tipple or two???? i'm up for anything you suggest!!
OOOOOEEEERRRRRR that sounded a bit dodgy!!! LOL love an hugs mother hen mel xxx
great to hear that darryl is feeling better, and you have got his anti sickness regime down to a t, your fantastic.
i know i miss teresa a lot too, hopefully her laptop will be fixed very soon eh?
will be thinking of you on friday as you go for your tests. dont run off the end of the treadmill though...lol....seriously though i will be thinking of you babe.
i can imagine darryl will be glad of the rest from hospitals for a while bless him!
hows your kirsty doing, and she comes home for 2 weeks soon doesnt she? bet you cant wait to see her
Mother Hen Mellymoo If you enjoyed gymkhanas they you would love polocrosse. She and her brothers also did well in clear rounds and chase me charlies!!
She went on to play mouted games (gymkhanas) for pony club and later for 16 + Kent team of young adult. That was scary, hormonally laden youngsters on ponies with a 'winning is all' attitued!
Thankyou for your kindess about DB and myself, I just want you to know mum had beaten breast cancer, with chemo,radio herceptin, her throat cancer was unrelated babe it hadnt spread, its an heredity thing,gran aunts etc remember babes my mums a lot older than you, This aint gonna happen to you ok? You are gonna beat this babe, give it the two fingers yeah!!! bloody ancestors,passed this on in my family Dont you dare get disheartend ok? get out there matey and kick some ass, Dont compare your troubles to the rest of this site ok? bossy cow I know but I care how your feelin As for your rebel girl, trust me she will come good ok? I was that babe Love you, think of you often babes xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey deputy Karen i think choccy firemen and a few tipples ound good to me!! Pass me the hose!! lol think i'll have a rum an coke what do you other chickies fancy???? I'll be land lady for the night! lol
Juls i used to love gymkhana's too and it was very adrenalin fueled!! lol Bring it on i say!!! lol
Kate you say all what we think to our chickie Kim you truely are the best one choccy fireman and a couple of tipples comimg your way!!! what's your drink i'm the land lady tonight!! lol
Kimmy love you loads your daughter will come through trust me i know these things!!! whats your drink for the night?
