Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
i read your rant, it was spot on mate and i'm sure most people on this site can relate to what you said, i hope your'e having one of the better days today, i have also read your profile and youv'e had a very tough time, my heart goes out to you!!
I have just been reading your post and i am so sorry to hear that you had to get the Dr out for Darryl, i hope he is feeling better now, it's amazing isn''t it, what side-effects the tratment can cause. I hope he has had plenty of sleep and you are resting.
My dad is half way there, He has his bone scan on Monday, so he's not looking forward to that.
Hi Mother Hen Mellymoo I hope the last two days have been good for you and Darryl and that his treatment went well with no more boust as he had on Wednesday evening.xxxxxxxx
Hi Karen how are you today?xxxxxxxxx
Hi Moomy I hope everything geos well for you tomorrow and on Monday will pm with you over weekendxxxxxxxxxx
Hope you are all ok? Daryl is doing lots better thank god! i think i have it cracked now! i give him anti sickness and painkillers 4 hrs before radiotherapy and then take the meds with us to the hospital and as soon as radio over with, i give him more anti sickness an pain meds straight away, then every four hours once we get home. It seems to have done the trick and he's had no more problems with sickness and just a mild headache now which he said is 99% better than it was. He has two more session of radio on monday and tuesday, and then sees his onco Dr Taylor on wednesday. If all is well then just has to have check ups every 6 weeks with ct scans, chest xrays and bloods. So we could be having a break from hospital routines for a while!! Whahoooo!!! I'm so proud daz (Darryl) has done so well!! He's my hero!!!! lol
I really must thank you all for all your support! what would i do without you all!!!! You're all so lovely and kind not sure how i'm ever going to repay you all! lol
Kate i'm so sorry babe that our DB not so good, but as you said babe she's pulled through before so lets hope she does again! Just be prepared for every eventuality babe. I don't men to put a downer on your day, but i hope you know what i mean???? We're all here for you whatever happens so never forget that, and i'm sure our DB will be ok with all the love and care you give her!! You really are a very special daughter, and if you were mine i would be so proud of you!! I'm proud of you anyway without you being my daughter cos you really are the best!!! I hope you and your dad are ok and getting some rest too. You take care babe love you loads and do keep letting us know how things go.Will be thinking of you tonight when i look at the moon.
Karen, Juls, Helen, My Little Tortoise Kim, Jacqs, rooster mick and anyone else i may have forgotten!! (my memory is getting worse i swear) lol
Thank you all so much for your kind words and all the support you have shown Daz and i over the past few days, and infact since i have come on here you are all amazing people even with your own worries you have always been here for me and for that i am eternally grateful!!! You are all the best people in the world, and i'm awarding you all gold medals today, cos without you all i honestly can say i would be truly lost!! You're all mellys angels and i love you all so very very much!!! xxxxxxx
Juls i hope Richard is having as good a day as possible today and send much love an hugs xxx
Helen i hope you are ok and that Caz continues to do well, any results yet? good luck with everything babe you deserve the best as you are the best!!! much love to you too xxxxx
Mick that made me laugh bout shutting the men in at the social club!!! It's the sort of thing that i would do!!! lol Thanks for your kind words mate, you are one of the best too!! At least you keep us all on level ground and keep us laughing! Whats that they say bout laughter and medicine??? Well thats you..... i say thats you...... lol I hope you're having a good day and send you much love and hugs xxxxx thanks mate!!
Jacqs welcome back babe, have missed you loads!!! Thanks for your kind words you really are so very kind especially as you have so much trouble with your poor dad at the moment. I hope his pain gets sorted out soon sweet and please do keep posting as it's so good to hear from you, plus i would like to know how your dad gets on with his bone scans. I've been thinking of you lots babe so please do keep posting won't you? Everyone on this thread are all so supportive and kind and all my little chickies will look after you as they have each other and me as well! So don't be shy and keep posting ok? love you loads babe and send big hugs to you xxxx
My little Tortoise Kimmy!!! How you doing today sweet? I hope you are having a comfortable day babe, and remember we are all here rooting for you!!! I hope to her from my little tortoise very soon as i do worry about you all so keep posting sweetie as we all care and miss you when we don't hear from you!! much love and big hugs xxxxx
Last but not least my little chickie Karen!!
Once again what a heroine you are!!!!!! What can i say to thank you??? Words fail me, now thats a miracle!!!! as i usually have loads to say!!! lol You really are such a brill surrogate mother hen, i can't thank you enough! When people are down you appear like an angel, with you words of encouragement and care! you truly are the best!! I would like to nominate you carer of the year to us all!! what does everyone else think???? You are the best of the best babe, and i know alot of people on here would be lost without you, and you deserve the carers award for sure!!! I'm also awarding you two extra gold medals as you so deserve them!!!!!! I love you so much and am proud to have you as a friend! I just hope i can repay your kindness and support one day! I hope you, Wills, and the boys are having a lovely day and i will pop back on later this evening to see if you are around. You take care sweet. love you loads an loads love an hugs sent to you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To everyone else you are all amazing people your courage and strenght shines through!!! I'm sorry i forget everyones names but i'm sure you all know who you are!!! My friends for life!!! you're all wonderful and all are the best people ever! I LOVE YOU ALL!!!! Much love and big hugs all round love and hugs mother hen mel xxxxx
Mother Hen Mel, I am so very happy that you have totally got on top of the anti-nausea and pain relief regime for Darryl, you are a star! I think I may happily speak for us all when I say how relieved we all are that the system you've found is working for him.....and am sure he is, too.....
Hello, everyone else, hope you are all doing well......love to you all.....
so pleased darryl is better with the radio, only 2 more to go hooray!!!!!!! and good luck for seeing onco next week! you are wonderful, and how youv'e managed his anti sickness regime, you are an angel!!!!! am thinking about you both and hope you have a good weekend. what a brilliant carer you are!!
well what can i say mellymoo?? am lost for words........lol............which is very unlike me..........lol i tried to go into kitchen and my head wouldnt get through the door...........lol..............thank you for your very kind words and for the medals and my award wow!!, your the one who deserves the medals etc.,as your totally amazing and a real treasure, and i love you tons!!!!!!
hope your feeling ok too and that youv'e both been able to rest and sleep better babe will come back tonight to see if your'e about
love you tons hunni and have a good day, and so so pleased our darryl is feeling bit better love and hugs your chickie karen xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
