Hello
My dad was diagnosed with Stage 4 Squamous Cell Carcinoma in his mouth and jaw. Six weeks ago, he underwent a 14-hour operation during which his heart stopped and they had to resuscitate him. He is recovering well, but slowly. He's lost weight, has to use a walker and has become quite philosophical. He is facing 5 weeks of radiation treatment from this week and, as with any challenges in his life, he's facing it with a sense of humour.
He and my mum are in South Africa. I am in London, and I have a brother elsewhere in the UK. I spent a month in South Africa supporting my parents through the surgery and hospitalization (including 10 days in ICU) and the first week at home. Back in the UK now, the weight and reality of possibly losing my dad and being able to do very little in the way of physically supporting my parents has hit me hard. Added to this, that I am partially estranged from my brother, who'd naturally be the first person I'd turn to for support. My husband and friends have been incredible, but I need to talk to someone with shared experience of seeing a parent fight cancer, all while being an ocean and a continent away from them.
I'd love to talk to anyone open to sharing their story with me.
Sorry to hear about what your dad and the rest of your family are going through. When my parents were ill things were difficult enough when they were only 100 miles away in the UK so I can only imagine what things must be like when they are in another country.
Hopefully someone with some more relevant experience will be along in a while but in the meantime I thought it might be helpful to share something I found quite useful - your feelings when someone has cancer - I found that being able to recognize the emotions and accept them as valid helped to make them less overwhelming.
<<hugs>>
Steve
