I'm Scared for my dad

Hi again sunflower234 

Hope you are keeping ok, we welcome everyone to the community and really glad you found us even at this early stage.

Definitely get the bit about unexplained sickness, it is really hard.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Hello Sunflower,

my son is struggling too with his dad's diagnosis. Is there anyone else you can talk to. The Macmillan helpline is a great place to start. Facing this kind of diagnosis and the prospect of losing your nearest and dearest is scary. That's a normal reaction to have especially in the early days and when there's still uncertainty.

You have done well to come in here and ask for help already. When you have more information and know what the treatment options are it may become clearer and easier on the way forward. If you can find someone you trust to talk to this will help. And taking care of yourself is really important.

It sounds like you have a close relationship with your dad and one which will help you through the days and weeks ahead and talking things through with him will also help if he's up to it. Try to take one step at a time and not to think about it all the time. Use distractions, go for brisk walks or runs. I find vigorous exercise really helps. 

Now and again (maybe once a week) I touch in with my son. Ask him how he is. How he's feeling. We've talked about how much information he wants and he wants it all, so he can sift through it himself. But my other son prefers to be drip fed bits of info when he's ready and doesn't dwell on things. He and his dad have a mantra: let's cross each bridge when we get to it.

It drives me a bit mad because I am a bit like you in imagining the worst but that also helps me to work out how I am going to deal with the worst case scenario. Once I know that I know I can deal with it and anything less. So it's about working out what's best for you.

Take care

Squeak