Terrified

Hello. I was diagnosed with secondary lung cancer last summer when I was about to undergo surgery to reverse my stoma. I felt yhe urge to reply because my Wife, too, was terrified.

I didn't have many options available because my original chemotherapy for bowel cancer led to an out of hospital cardiac arrest - which exacerbated my Wife's emotions. So, it was decided that chemotherapy wasn't a good idea this time.

I had surgery on 30/9/23, a lung resection to remove the lower lobe of my left lung through an opening in my ribs. Sounds horrific, doesn't it? 

The surgery was a success and my recovery time was fairly rapid, too. I've never been a smoker so I'm not sure if this enabled me to recover more quickly? The obvious shortness of breath went after about 6 weeks and now, it feels like it never happened, apart from seeing the 4 impressive scars. My Wife is calmer, she knows its now incurable but can see that I am as well as can be expected. 

Is your husband taking it calmly or is he worried, too?

I make myself go out as often as possible, meaning most days, gigs, shows, Wolves matches or even the pub! I don't let the dark thoughts take over, I just keep very busy. This has been important for my Wife, as well as me. 

Thank you for taking the time to reply, I’m glad the surgery went well. I’m out case surgery is not an option because of the fluid so it’s chemo, first appt next week. I felt very emotional yesterday as he was finally getting a decent sleep after being in hospital all week, I was trying to get a sleep in but the the well wishers started to nesssge which set me off, thankfully he is calmer then me and I don’t want him to see me breakdown. I’m going to try and get hold of my doctors and get some sleeping tablets as sure I’d be much better when I can get more than a few hours sleep each night. Thank you again

I'm not sure if this is of any use to you? I live remotely from the vast majority of my friends and family.  I keep in touch on Facebook and WhatsApp. 

When I advised everyone last summer that the cancer had spread to my lungs, so my reversal operation had been cancelled, I stated, "As you can imagine, this has come as a bit of a shock, and to be fair, Heidi and I are struggling to talk about everything without gettingemotional, so please don't call or message. We'd really appreciate it."

It worked a treat. We had a few reactions / emoticons, but people generally did as we asked.

All the very best to you, I wish you both well. 

Thank you, that is exactly how I feel, I’ve copied this, thank you so much