Mum has cancer

Hello my mum has recently had many tests scans etc and is awaiting biopsy results, although told they’re not 100% sure it’s cancer yet until biopsy results she has been told it’s almost certain from ultrasound/mri/ct results. She was also given contact numbers for staff at the hospital who all belong to the cancer and GI cancer team. Apparently it’s definate in liver and possibly in stomach or bowel also. I’ll be honest I’m not sure how to feel, I feel bad for her obviously but also angry as she has been a big drinker for years and I’ve tried everything to help which hasn’t worked and now she’s got liver cancer, I know it’ll sound awful but all my head is saying is ‘I told you so’, I knew something would happen eventually and that her drinking would catch up with her. I’m so angry that she couldn’t even do it for me or her grandchildren. I am a nurse myself and I have seen the expenctacy from liver cancer especially secondary and it isn’t great, she has an appointment next week to discuss treatment and confirm the diagnosis etc so after that we’ll know what the plan is but I’m currently feeling floaty if that makes sense? Can’t concentrate on anything or think about anything but what’s going on