Hi - I’m looking for some support, I hope. My dad died on the 22 feb from secondary cancer after a December diagnosis. At the same time my mum was diagnosed with a rare aggressive stage 4 nasal/sinus cancer. She is currently at a hospice receiving end of life care. I am numb tbh. I visit her most days and my daughters are very supportive as is my husband. Mum looks horrific as the tumour is growing every day. She’s on morphine but still eats soup twice a day, but is becoming frailer and more helpless. She wants to die but we just don’t know how long she has. It could be weeks or days, we just don’t know. I can’t imagine life without her or my dad. I have my dad’s funeral next week and my mums to think or my dad and it’s all just too much. Everyone says I should look after myself, but how do you actually do that when you spend most days trying to juggle work/ life and a 120 mile round trip.
Hi Lisa1967
Sorry to hear about both your parents and I am not at all surprised about how you are feeling.
I ended up doing a living with less stress course and it helped me focus on the here and now as it helped me appreciate what we have. For both my parents funerals we had a great celebration of a life well lived and that really helped. At a friends funeral more recently the celebrant said that grief is the price we pay for love and that really spoke to me.
I know at times I had to take a break from work because I was totally overloaded and that was the only thing that could give easily - the positive was I got full pay while sick and my GP was very supportive.
If you think it might help you are more than welcome to speak to one of the advisers on our phone line - that human voice and connection can be a great postivie.
<<hugs>>
Steve
