Hello all,
This year my best friend found out he has a grade 4 brain tumour, he’s had surgery to remove most of the tumour and he’s just starting intensive chemotherapy and radiotherapy. It’s really hit him hard and it’s been heartbreaking seeing him taken from being so independent to being confined to his bed.
I never had a brother and neither did he so we’ve become like brothers and we are each-others only close friend. As I see him in that state I feel so much guilt over anything I may have internally criticised him about or to others before all this started. I know that any moans were just about me wanting the best for him and caring, but I just cant shake the guilt.
We all have our gripes and moans about those we love but the thought of possibly losing him knowing i said negative things in the past is more than I can bear.
How do others cope with that feeling and all the other emotions that come with this?
Thank you for reading!
Hi Dvfell98 welcome to the forum. I cant help wondering why you feel at all guilty as we all say things and make assumptions about things and people when we don't know them, so you are not alone in having done that. You wouldn;t be human or normal if you didnt do that when you didnt know anyone and it takes someone with a big heart, like yours, to admit that they made a mistake and changed their mind and that this person is actually now the best pal you could ever have. Some people live a lifetime and never get that, so you are so lucky you have such a true and loyal friendship. Thats whats important now and always had been so give your self a break because from where I'm reading you have nothing to feel guilty about but a lot to celebrate that there is such a strong bond there between you and he is lucky to have you by his side through thick and thin.
Best Wishes .
gail
