Husband diagnosed

Hi Sessykc and welcome to our community though always a little bit sorry to see another friend join this clan.

A diagnosis is nearly always a shock, though in rare cases it can be finally getting at least an answer to a long term health issue. Getting from that first diagnosis to the point where treatment options are being discussed almost everyone finds about the hardest part of all.

My wife was very clear she never wanted a prognosis and I really struggled with that, we had a young son and I was able to imagine all sorts of things that could happen but never did, meanwhile life decided to throw things completely unexpected at us.

There is a lot of information about lung cancer here and there is a page of advice for those just diagnosed

Then for you we have Looking after someone with cancer and I would highlight in that the coping with being a carer section. We even have a special section on here Carers only forum for help and support just between us.

I ended up getting myself in a bit of a mess, then I finally looked for help. First I went in to my local Maggies and ctried my heart out. Later I did a living with less stress course - learnt to appreciate what we have rather than worrying about tomorrow, next month, next year whatever and that meant I got more good days. The conscious breathing exercises were great too for when life decides to throw us another curveball. Transcendental meditation though did not really work for me.

Perhaps I would flag as the most important part of all - keep talking -  even if just typing on here with complete strangers who can rapidly become best friends.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Thank you, Steve. I appreciate you taking h the time to respond. How is your wife now and life  in general?

Just getting my head round things but I will check out the sources of support you mention. Where did you find the stress course and how was that delivered?

We had the news yesterday. We'll be attending an appointment in about a week to get the full details so we are in limbo at the moment. Bless him, my husband is worrying about the work on our bathroom (which he's doing as he's a plumber/builder). 

I must admit,  I'm trying g not to think/dwell too much or my mind takes me to places I don't want to go, despite the resolution to remain positive. 

I will indeed keep talking. Thank you. 

Sarah.

Hi Sarah,

Janice is in really quite good health, with her cancer having been stable now for some time and not apparently causing any great issue the oncologist is thinking of discharging her to the care of our GP. Probably more of an issue for her at the moment is her diabetes.

My living with less stress course was done by Maggie's, they do them from time to time in centres but I did an experimental version they were trying out online. There are lots of similar courses, indeed I even did one through my work though that did not have a focus on the effects of cancer.

I think we would all like the magic wand that says "think positive", but that is really hard. Sometimes it can help to notice we are struggling and accept that as normal - this can really help turn things around a bit.

<<hugs>>

Steve