I had previously written about my partner of 10 years being originally diagnosed with penile cancer towards the end of last year. It's been a roller-coaster of emotions and he really went through every worst case scenario. I said my bye to him, which was heart breaking and beautiful. He had held off in sedatives to do this. He passed away on 25/6 aged 44 I honestly don't know how I'm going to get through this. I guess day by day x
Sorry to read this and so young too.
There is of course no "right way" to deal with grief and the most important thing of all is to be nice to yourself. If you feel that somehow you get stuck somewhere and that is creating a problem then it may be worth seeking some help and both the loss foundation and cruse bereavement care are highly rated for the support they can give.