Hello everyone, i've joined this forum today because i have completely hit rock bottom. My Dad was diagnosed with stage 4 renal cancer in September, he was given a prognosis of 2 weeks to 8 weeks. He is still here with us. He is in a nursing home, myself and my two sisters split each day into 3 shifts to go and see him (morning, dinner, night) between us. He has alzheimers but still knows us. I just feel like ive now hit rock bottom, i know you all go through this and get through it, but i just feel lost, weve thought we were going to lose him a number of times but hes come through. I just cant watch my Dad who I absolutely adore and worship struggle and suffer anymore. Ive been off work with stress and anxiety and I am due to return mainly for financial reasons but also to try and get a bit of routine or normality back. I dont know what i need or want but i just feel so flat and in limbo and Exhausted all of the time. I just wanted to touch base with people who are in the same situation.
Hi Jillf1982
I can certainly understand how being at work can create a sense of normality since I have been there in the past. I was lucky in that I had a very sympathetic boss who very much took a steer from me as to what I was able to do and I was working in a team so could ensure that if I had to drop things at short notice others could pick up from where we were.
It can sometimes seem all we think of is how are loved ones are now and it does take time to process and remember all the good times, When my dad died there was a certain sense of relief that is was all over but a real sense of loss too in that we no longer had to care for him tinged with guilt that we ever felt we were caring and a question of how to we move forward with our lives without him.
<<hugs>>
Steve
