Hello,
my first time posting. In the early hours of Xmas eve we were told my dad had lung cancer which appears to have spread to the liver. We are still waiting on biopsy’s to confirm this.
My dad has smoked since he was 15 ( now 65) his siblings all smokers died from lung cancer. I always knew this day would come so felt I’ve always tried to prepare my mind for it. As sad as that is. My mum however who has struggled with depression and anxiety for years is struggling to cope. She told me on Boxing Day once my dad dies she is going to kill herself. We are trying to get her to speak to a counsellor about this. It’s not the first time she has said this and uses this as a cry for help.
I think I’m struggling ore with the thought of handling my mum once my dad dies more than the diagnosis at present. I’m trying to breathe in every moment with him while he is still here but struggling to cope with the thought of dealing with her once he is gone. She can be a nasty person and my dad normally handles her outbursts. I have a supportive brother which is great.
Myself and my brother both have young children 4 and under. I’m struggling with the thought of telling my daughter and when to tell her. My grandmother passed away in June and so far my daughter has handled this amazingly but I feel her bond with her grandad is so much stronger and his presence will be more missed. Putting a brave face on all the time has been hard.
we still don’t know the prognosis for dad yet but fearing the worst. He seems to have gone downhill very quickly and in a lot of pain. He has stopped smoking since he found out but I find myself being angry at him for not doing it sooner. Why couldn’t he find this strength to do it years ago when his dad died or his siblings.
Thank you for reading and any advice or support would be appreciated.
Thank you
