Terminal diagnosis - telling children

Hello sorry to hear about your mother in law.. my dad has terminal cancer.. and my 2 children who has autism is really close to my dad to... I think all u can do is tell the truth... all me and my mam said to my 2.. was grandads really poorly.. so there will be a time when he has to go in the sky with the angels... hope this helps stay strong xxx

Thank you very much for taking the time to reply to me. I am so sorry to hear about your Dad too. I had a discussion with the children today. I’m not sure if it’s right but I kept it short and to the point for them. I did find some advice online for how to tell children and used that. Thanks again for replying and take care x

Your welcome and you take care too xx

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. My mom has just decided to end her treatment so it’s just a matter of time which is breaking me. 
I have a 2 year old son who absolutely adores his Nannie and she idolises him and it’s gut wrenching to know he won’t have her around as he grows. 
He isn’t at the stage where he has the understanding yet for a proper conversation about it, but whilst he was in bed the other night having his bottle I calmly said something like  “nannie’s very poorly and medicine won’t make her better anymore”. I read about using the actual words “dying or died” rather than “they’ve gone away” or “they’ve gone to a better place” as it can confuse them and scare them that people will start going away or they are in a bad place now etc. I don’t think he fully understands but it helped me in the process so I hope this helps you too. Xxx

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I am so very sorry to hear about your Mom. 
I used very similar wording regarding the medicine not working and I had also read online to use almost blunt wording rather than vague phrases. I’m not sure if I did the right thing but I gave them a cuddly toy each. I said this was from her and that when they cuddled it then she would feel it. It seems to have given them some comfort although I worry it was maybe not the correct thing to do. I’ve also been recommended the book “The Invisible String” to read with them so have ordered that. 
Take care of yourself. 

I don’t think you can ever do the wrong thing in this situation so if you felt it was right for your children then it must be right. I think that’s such a sweet idea about the cuddly toy. 
Yes I saw that book! I think I will order it too. It’s such a moving and lovely story. 
you take care of yourself too. Xx

Hi sorry to read your news about your mother-in-law, with children it is very hard to make it simple enough for them to understand without them getting concerned who next. A friend has suggested a book she has used for her children when they were going through it with their Grandma -  Lost in the Clouds: A gentle story to help children understand death and grief. By Tom Tinn-Disbury 

Also try Marie Curie they have a lot of places that you can be signposted to for support : 

https://booksbeyondwords.co.uk/ 
https://www.griefencounter.org.uk/

just two links that may help

1. My kids have their Dad diagnosed with terminal cancer but we keep talking & having hugs. For your children make memory boxes of their Nan it may help them when they grow older. 
   
   Take care of you & your family hope this has helped even in a small way xx