Terminal diagnosis

Hi @almcuk,

My wife's cancer was incurable from diagnosis but her chemotherapy has managed to render the cancer stable - our new gold standard. It took me a while and a living with less stress course to help me deal with the world of living with cancer.

One side effect of the chemo on my wife was it caused a lung to collapse - she had had six of those and each made her quite poorly, but the doctors managed to fix that.

Having a cancer diagnosis does not protect people from all sorts of other issues so some days they might be poorly because they are ill - the one plus is that GP care is often more accessible to people with cancer.

It might help to look at Looking after someone with cancer and especially the bit about who can support me - and post here whenever you need.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Thanks Steve src60 I’ll take a look at the link. 
live signed up for a course with MIND on dealing with grief.

i think it’s just the speed it’s all happened. I was fine until today then it just hit me. 
and I think my mum is really low as it’s final, there is no treatment for her (the radiotherapy is just for the node on her neck) 

we put my dad into respite to give her a break but I think having only herself to think about has actually made her feel worse.

pits just so sad, but I definitely need to find a coping mechanism for my emotions.

thank you x

Hi almcuk,

my mum also has been diagnosed in the last year and is about to start radiotherapy as the chemo isn’t shrinking the tumour. I can really empathise feeling overwhelmed. Tonight has been really difficult as today we found out the chemo hasn’t been working. I talked to someone about it who is never normally and had a really good cry. I felt better for it as I haven’t had to feel guilty for not staying strong for my family as I’ve had my own outlet. 

Sending love x

Hi  I think that’s been my problem, I’ve not cried at all. From her diagnosis, through all the scans and appointments, I’ve held everything in to keep strong for her, trying to stay focused on spending positive times together, but today hit me really hard, the cancer is spreading way faster than we thought it would, it’s just a bit too soon... 

im glad you found someone you could cry it out with. I have a feeling my cry is going to help too, it clears the system a little. 
im just scared if I start I won’t stop.. 

sending thoughts your way too xx