Hello All
Sat writing this having this minute joined the Macmillan community feels very strange and unreal. My mum was diagnosed with breast cancer on Monday, the hospital seem optimistic it’s been caught early and is treatable which is positive. She has scans booked for tomorrow and next Thursday to see if there is further cancer in the breast or other parts of her body. The mixture of emotions has hit me like a truck and I don’t even know how to process or let any of it out.
Even though I’m very close to my parents, I have wonderful supportive friends and fiancé I feel so alone. My parents have no idea how much I’m struggling, the last thing I want is for them to worry about me, I feel a huge amount of guilt that it’s effecting me so much I just don’t know how to deal with everything I’m feeling.
Hi
Welcome to the community, thought sorry to hear about your mum I would like to thank you for writing this. Any cancer diagnosis is a shock and is often described as a tsunami that can overwhelm all who care.
Your parents almost certainly do know and are worried about the effect it is having on you, If you look at talking with someone who has cancer you will see just how normal you are so there is no need to fell guilty at all.
Glad you have friends and your fiance - but it can be hard for them to understand the effects unless they have been there themselves; some of course may have been but themselves have felt alone isolated and never really processed those emotions themselves.
Perhaps a really important message though is your mum did the right thing - she got it checked out and is in absolutely the best place possible at the moment.
Do post whenever whatever and we will stand alongside you, if it helps you are more than welcome to ring our helpline too - I have cried my eyes out to them in the past because together we are better.
<<hugs>>
Steve
Hi Steve
Thank you for your conforming kind words, I’ve been told a lot over the past few days it’s normal to experience so many emotions and feelings and when you describe it as like a tsunami that’s EXACTLY how it feels. I’ve recognised I’m struggling and have contacted my GP for support, I really want to utilise the support here as well. The more support I can get for myself, the better place I’ll be in to fully support my Mum and that’s the most important thing.
thanks again for your support Steve and you’re right, together we are better 
Gemma
