Selfishly Suicidal?

Hi 

Really sorry to hear about your dad . It is very overwhelming to hear someone you love has cancer . You sound as though you have a great relationship and connection . 
Has your dad been given a treatment plan yet ? Do you know a bit more about what type of cancer he has ? 
We also have a helpline here 0808 808 0000 and the staff would be more than happy to chat through some of these issues through with you .

Take care ,

Court 

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I thought I would comment because I went through the same thing. I lost my mom to cancer when I was 23. She was always my person. I’ve suffered from severe panic attacks and depression since I was 12 and also agoraphobia. I had trouble leaving the house unless I was with her. She made me feel safe. When I lost her I didn’t know how to exist without her. Growing up my worst fear was always losing my mom and when it happened it completely flipped my world upside down. But I got through it. I got with a grief counselor and was given some additional anxiety medication. I journaled a lot. I’d talk out loud to my mom a lot too and it brought me a little comfort. I’d write her letters. It took some time. And it was painful. But it’s been 16 years and I’m still here. I still miss her, but my grief doesn’t consume me anymore. I don’t know your dad’s situation or prognosis, but try to stay positive. I know it’s so hard and so scary.