Good Evening all,
First time poster here! Well I’m 24 and my dad has terminal cancer, we’ve always knew from the beginning (last July) that there was nothing as such they could do but just to try and make his life longer. Chemo tablets are working at keeping the tumours more stable however, it’s himself that’s gone down hill.
Never did I sit and think I would watch my dad going from being a 54 year old 14 stone independent man to being now this frail old man in a chair that can hardly do anything for himself. Weighing now less than me at 8.5 stone and being hardly able to walk.
All he says to me is that he’s had enough and that he doesn’t want to be here anymore like this. I mean honestly, what do you say back to that? Apart from cry or put on a brave face and say I know.
Wow I never imagined things to be like this and Covid sure doesn’t help! I’m sure there’s so many other people that are in situations like mine (better or worse) but we just keep going hey! Well that’s all for now but I know I’ll be back!
Hi and welcome to the community though so sorry to hear about your dad.
I can sort of understand perhaps where your dad might be coming from, some times on here people talk about pre-grief, the sense of grieving for the life we think we lost.
When my parents got old and sick one of the things we did manage to do was learn more about their youth - going through old photo albums for instance can kindle fond memories of times past and I know we managed to learn more about them - and their amazing life - that perhaps we ever realised - and those memories are very precious to us.
I like to think of tears as my love overflowing and leaking out of my eyes.
<<hugs>>
Steve
I am so sorry to hear this
My nana passed away with Cancer 4 years ago and I can tell you it never gets easy however you learn to live with it and remember the good times.
No one will be expecting you to be jumping up and doing somersaults lovely. Time is the biggest thing but it’s so important to remember it is your time and you take as much of it as you need! Take your time to grieve the loss of someone who meant/still means so much to you, take the time to cry when your sad and smile when you remember the good times.
Never feel like you are alone and keep talking to people about it. Like I said it’s not going to be easy however one day you will wake up and smile because you remember a lovely memory of you and your dad. I’m sending you so much love with this message xxx
