Reeling from my dads diagnosis

It is under two weeks since my wonderful dad, with me holding his hand, was told he had terminal lung cancer and his life expectancy was a few weeks or months at best. I was distraught but dad just told me don’t cry. The specialist explain if they did a biopsy the may find something to allow a little more time. My dad was so brave and he refused the biopsy and turned to the specialist and told him no, that he had long and happy life and thanked him for his honesty but that he would prefer if the doctor would continue his work by treating those that could be given a chance of lifeAt that point the specialist had tears in his eyes. 

My mum and dad have been married for nearly 65 years and all dad was concerned about was my mum and me. Mum has severe dementia and dad is her main carer and I have a neurological illness and a chronic medical condition. Just like my dad he thinks of others before himself. I visit mum and every day and dad refuses any help. The only chance to do hoovering and dusting when they have gone to their shops. Even after his diagnosis he still looks after mum but he struggled to breathe. I am devastated as I am my fathers daughter and every night I go bed around 7.00 pm not to sleep but cry, as I don’t want to my day crying.

This last week as been a nightmare as mum won’t let me gather the information to apply for benefits for dad, but not only that I have to have lasting power of attorney for both parents knowing dad could die before it’s granted. I am trying to be strong but there is so much to much to do and I feel ill and don’t honestly think I can handle all that needs to be done and it’s tearing me apart.