Hi my boyfriends mum had lymphoma cancer for over 15 years now. 3 years ago she was in remission but a month ago this year found a lump in her groin which has come back being cancer again, went for treatment but hasn’t worked. I’m really stuck to what to say to him or what to do.. I’m so worried about what’s going to be the outcome this time ️
Hi , I am sorry to hear about your boyfriends mum and her recurrence, and how worried you are for her and him. It’s not easy to know what to say or how to help. There is a section on Macmillan on talking about cancer, it’s directed at talking to the person with cancer but I think it can equally be applied to someone close to the patient. I read it before I started visiting a friend and her husband who had a recurrence.
I love the way this section also covers how to be a good listener, as sometimes that’s all that is needed, to show that your there for them, if they want to talk. I’ve always been a better listener than a talker so I think I know how your feeling. Of course sometimes people don’t want to talk and just want a distraction from all the angst that they are going through, and I bet you already know what makes your boyfriend happy so it’s a bit of playing it by ear. There’s a section on what not to say as well, that gives other ways to rephrase things.
I don’t know if the section will help you I just know I found it useful.
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