Hi. I’m new to this but I’m just so distraught. My DIL was diagnosed with breast cancer 2 years ago and she had a double mastectomy. Then it came vsvk in the same place but in the skin tissue. It all looked to be favourable and the prognosis was brilliant. They a few weeks ago she got a persistent back ache and yesterday she was diagnosed with liver cancer that has spread to her lymph nodes. She us just 33 and has a 4 year old daughter to live for. We are all devastated! There are many blanks and questions needing answering in the coming days but she had a biopsy and we are hoping for quick results. How do you tell a 4 year old her Mummy may die? How do you support your son who may lose his wife? How do you know what to say? I am bereft of words and at a loss to know what to do.
Hi and welcome to the community though sorry to hear about your daughter-in-law.
When my wife was first diagnosed (incurable Leiomyosarcoma) our son was a little bit older but I did manage to put together a list of books that can be helpful in talking to children
The Secret C: straight talking about cancer (2009) by Julia Stokes, is a book published by Winston's Wish, a charity for bereaved children. (Whilst many of the charity's books focus on bereavement, there are some which are useful when a parent or someone else close is dealing with a serious illness).
As Big as it Gets (2007) again, by Julia Stokes and published by Winston's wish. This can help a child talk through a number of different scenarios, and generally has good reviews.
Because someone I love has cancer (2006) by Terri Ades, is a children's activity book which can help a child talk through and process some of the complex and new feelings they may have because of cancer within the family.
The cancer that wouldn't go away (2013) by Hadassa Field, may be a little young for your son, but it talks about metastatic cancer and living with a parent with a cancer which isn't curable.
Perhaps waiting is something we all struggle with, hope the results come in quick,
<<hugs>>
Steve
