Having a bad day

On yes Rules rule...jx

Mums funeral is 25 January the earliesf we xould get. On the day bright colours orange pink lime green anything happy. She was a cheerful bright and breezy woman, not afraid to say what she thought and the biggest heart ive ever known x

Lovely idea...I have a bright multi coloured scarf...I'll wear that or if not going out ..nail varnish  jx

Hope you're feeling better soon Jenny.

Maisiemae I too will wear a bright colour for your mum on the 25th.

Sue, Yantibee how are are you doing?  

I'm struggling a bit at the moment but have been thinking of you all.

X

How are you Elenium? It's horribly lonely being up in the night isn't it? All the fears crowd in. There should be a night chat thread!

Hello all. My brother & sister have been the squeakiest wheels since mum died. Ive realised they have made it about them or i have made it about me. When really its about my sweet sweet  mummy. She will get all my oil again. Im going to her house on my own this week. Ive got to reconnect to write eulogy. Was the past year a figment of my nightmare imagination. Im not sure i breathed properly the entire time. Im desparately lonely and desolate x

Maisiemae I feel your desolate loneliness as I am there too. Totally devastated by what has happened. The ceremony over and the spotlight we seemed to be in has been switched off but the boys and me are just broken. We miss our beloved Jill so so terribly and the pain is cruel. Going to bed is so hard as it is such a lonely process now and then the worst bit is waking up!, it's like the arm has gone back to the start of the record and the pain and sadness plays again every sad dawn

Ignored the phone all weekend just spent Saturday with my brother who came up from Frinton for the funeral with his family, then a meal at my parents on the evening. Sunday didn't get dressed until 3 just felt like " what's the point?" 

Still off work and will be all week, back next Monday and not looking forward to that. 

Funeral was so sad yet so beautiful, Jill's plum coloured coffin was stunning and matched my shoes perfectly!! Totally overwhelming how many were at the Crematorium there was at least 300 so I was told, the greeting and thanking at the end of the service seemed to go on for ever and the emotion of the mourners was very touching 

Take time with the eulogy maisiemae I wrote 4 before finally managing to get what I wanted to say down on paper, I couldn't read it so my uncle, a Monsignor who married us in '98 , he conducted the service and bravery read it, not a dry eye in the house but it said all I could say in such a short space of time. 

I have picked my bright colours for your darling mummies day and will be with you like so many others of us in this community 

Take care

Hope everyone else is as ok as can be , I read all the posts but don't always reply but you are in my thoughts 

Hi all am reading your moving posts... much love to all.

Have raging flu so v short post...

Jx

Mum v bad and I can't help...

Hate all this.

Sister finding it a struggle as not used to handling stuff.  Steep learning curve. 

Jx

This time will bind folks and sister a stronger bond and hopefully understand yr dedication. Hard though. Get yourself better xxx