Having a bad day

No worries, you are welcome. All these seemingly doable things become a big problem,I remember it well. Trying to get my Mum to hospital appts was a major operation. She had lost her mobility, so Dad and I had to try to get her in the car, so difficult. Sometimes you have to shout very loudly, be an advocate for your Mum. I did and things changed. Wish you well.

Take care, Anneteresa

That anxiety gasp thing is horrible I do it too.  We operate better after sleep so it's not helpful at all.

Yep moving Mum anywhere is nearing the impossible now.

Elenium...a hand squeeze for you..

Jx

Mum is on Zomorph 3 at night 2 in morning (slow release) and 10ml of Oromorph for breakthrough pain. Driver not yet fitted although she is struggling to swallow properly now

It all seems to happening at once for us/mums.  They've upped mum's morphine and it's making her very sleepy and more confused.  She didn't remember that my children had spent all Christmas day with her or any of her Christmas presents.  My sister (helpful one) did mum a photo album.  It was brilliant, but mum didn't remember that she's looked through it.  

The GP came to have a talk with mum (the homes's GP not ours) and started on about what to expect with mum's cancer and about what would happen if they had to give her CPR  - ribs could break.  I told her to stop talking. She looked shocked.  I told her she didn't need to be so brutal and to stop talking.  I then told them to never to talk to my mum like that or about her cancer again.  Mum was so upset.  It was awful.  We had a good cry together and she said that she was so scared of dying.  I told her that she didn't need to be scared because Dad is waiting for her.  She said that she doesn't want to leave us all.  I told her she wouldn't because she'll be with us in our hearts all the time.  I said to her that when her time came dad was going to be there for her and she'd get up out of the bed and be young again, just like in the Ghost and Mrs Muir.  It made her laugh.  It was a shit day!

She's a bit better now mood wise, although I think she covers it up for me.  We managed to get her hair done which has pleased her.

I'm having a day out today.  I'm on the train to London.  I'm going to have a mooch, take some pictures and meet a friend for lunch.  Not necessarily in that order.  

I really want to give you, my friends, a great big hug.  I read all your posts and my heart breaks for you but I have no words.  Just know that if I could come and help you I would.

Love to you all.  XXX

Oh Elenium - tell the hard hitting talkers to go F themselves, too used to doing it. We had DN comment twice on how small mums house is, it really upset her. Im going into London (in in) to go out, not out out. Elenium, wave to me my dear friend. X

Hello Jenny,

I so feel for you, how on earth are you looking after 2 sick parents with so little help? No wonder you feel so bad. I looked after Mum with my Dad (who was fit), and still had carers 3 times a day, was offfered a Marie Curie nurse at night, and volunteer sitters would come in during the day, if we wanted to go out. That was in Essex. Sometimes you have to shout very loudly to get what you need, also involve GP, as clearly your health is suffering. I wish you wel.

Take care, Anneteresa

My dear friends. Community nurse has just said she think mum has days left. My heart will break, I cant ever be the same person again. Life can be cruel but I dont wish my darling mummy to suffer any longer. Im driving there in the morning as its too dangerous to go tonight. How oh how can anyone bear this heartache??? X

Oh Maisiemae, how Awful!! You'll never be the same you there'll be a piece of you missing. A friend once asked me how to pick up the pieces and start again. I told her that sometimes you can't find all the pieces, and have to make a alternate jigsaw puzzle. That's what I've had to do in the past. Maybe that's why, n spite of losing my darling Alan, I know I'll be ok at some point. 

Drive carefully and get to your Mummy's safely. Then hold her close & tell her you love her. She'll go knowing she was loved & cared about. My heart breaks for you Lovely Lady.

Hugs

Sue xx

Oh maisiemae,

I'll be holding your hand tomorrow and sending you love.  Remember that you did the best you could for your mum, she knows that and she loves you.  She knows that you love her too.  She will always be with you, you will carry her in your heart forever.

XXX

Dear Maisiemae 

Travel safely tomorrow, you are in my thoughts at this terrible time . For what comfort it brings we are all there with you with our hearts, take care x