Having a bad day

Hi all,

I've not fallen off the planet (yet). I've had headaches on & off for the past week. It's a combination of stress, not eating properly & missing my Alan. I watched World Superbike (WSB)highlights yesterday. The first races of the season. Watching/going to bike racing was our absolute pleasure. Alan & I met online through a shared love of motorbikes. The first time  he took me to Mallory Park for British Superbikes (BSB) he admitted that evening that he thought I'd just said I liked the racing because he did! He said that he realised I DID enjoy it when I was cheering louder than him!!! I'm not sure how I'll feel on March 22nd when I go to Donington Park circuit with some friends to scatter his ashes. 

The headaches have left me feeling quite vulnerable if that makes sense.

Maisiemae, your idea of a walk & a picnic sounds wonderful. 

I also have thoughts about Dignity in Dying. But I'm not ready to share them yet. Suffice to say Alan & I had a signal.

Bless you all this rainy blustery day.

Hugs to all

Sue xx

Just escaped all to walk a bit and hailstones driven me into cafe.. the whole probate thing plus million questions about dad care inheritance tax when he dies and gifting money driven me mad had to get out. He won't be around in 7 years time...All v grim.  I told sister NOT to tell him it all its too much.but ..she told him...he cried.. marvellous.

Calmed him said it's only money govt will take their 40% whatever so don't worry... he hasn't even got any yet it's a way off till mums place sold..that'll break my heart.

Re  meet up yes somewhere accessible by train please then walk and picnic. ..my knees not great for  big ramble but love a walk...fresh air.  The very dogs too but am allergic so bring them please. ..and I will sneeze

Hug to all.

Sorry for rant.

Jx

Ps need notice due to dad care and sorting mums house in sussex jx

I'm finding it harder and harder to go to mum's.  I go in every couple of days to make sure everything is ok.  Might have to ask my sister if she can go in sometimes. 

Not a good day today so I've kept myself busy and am now absolutely knackered and my back's hurting so much.  But feeling a bit better.

I'm all up for a walk and a picnic.  Did you have somewhere in mind?

Hugs to all.  I think we all need one today...

X

You're right i think we do. Got back had meltdown boyfriend gave me strong gin I fell asleep now have headache

Back to Dad's tomorrow. 

Jx

Jenny,

The thing is you are out of practice in the drinking alcohol thing, we all are/were as we've all been the responsible adults! Hence the headache.

Love to all

X 

I liked it when we weren't responsible adults !! Oh how we wish the clock would rewind 

Oh so true jx

Me too.

Xx

Oh, I so feel each and everyones' pain. It is 11 years yesterday since my Mum died. I can remember every second like it was yesterday. That is not to frighten people, as it is not a horrible feeling. Just very sad. I am now going through it with my Dad. He has advanced anal cancer, but unlike my Mum I can't nurse him, as he is a Chelsea Pensioner, also I have Fibromyalgia. He has been doing ok up till the last couple of weeks, and now says he doesn't want to live like this. He is uncomfortable all the time ( tho not in great pain ) and does not sleep. He has also been thinking he should have more treatment, and wonders why he hasn't. It has been very difficult to get him to understand there is no more treatment, and he is just having palliative care. I think he has realised this in the last couple of days,so it has been very upsetting. I know he is getting the best care, but I am so far away, and it is not me giving it. I am finding that so difficult.

Take care, Anneteresa