Lonely - miss having a close friend/companion

Hi Kate

What a lovely post about the benefits which can go both ways when you’re able to get involved in things like this. It’s certainly something to think about, and I hope you continue to find your life enhanced by what you do.

Sarah xx

Hi Sheila

I go on holiday too-with a lot of help-and strangely find things easier when I’m away! I’m happy to chat to others when sitting outside a cafe watching the world go by! 

I don’t really feel sorry for myself being isolated at home-it’s quiet and peaceful and I have my cat for company and I too am very used to my life after several years of it. I do get annoyed at myself sometimes for making what seem like excuses not to go out, but it’s just so hard to do for so many reasons.

I’ve had a couple of small wins this week with lovely phone calls from my closest friend, and my younger daughter and I’m expecting another call hopefully today from another friend I haven’t chatted to in a while. Hearing all their updates on life is a real boost for me. 

Sarah xx

What a great expression, I've not heard it in a long time, but it is so true! Those fine weather friends indeed, or is it fair weather, either way it's a shame people don't have the capacity or resilience to be there for others.

Like you say though, I find it hard at times myself, so we understand it's challenging, and I have also found myself on the other side at times too, and know it can be very anxiety provoking, often we just have no idea what to do or say, but we don't hone those social and emotional skills if we just avoid difficult situations. And at any rate, most people just want your presence, a hug, a held hand, just being there can make all the difference.

My mum has dementia, and yet I'm the sibling who makes time for her, and my dad who's her carer. I have 3 adult siblings, 2 of which don't have parenting responsibilities or health problems, and it just saddens me my parents feel this perceived lack of care or help. Though I do understand people can only do what they can and we don't know what others are really going through and dealing with, so I try not to judge and I know it's a complex thing and a strained world we live in. 

But I'm only human, so my disappointment does often piff me off 

It's awful that when your husband passed, people crossed the road to avoid you! I can't begin to imagine how heart breaking that must have been, on top of your grief as well . So glad you found support at your groups, and I hope to find similar for myself near me. Though like you, I also gain a lot by being on here 

Hi Kate,

I love this and have decided to volunteer as a befriender!

I would absolutely love to visit care homes, I especially love the elderly and I feel very excited at the prospect of befriending some old people .

I don't have any elderly relatives (parents are only in their late 60's) and I spent my whole life looking forward to being old, and of course that's now not going to happen - I'm 47, so it's a wonderful way for me to embrace my old age now!

Thank you so much for sharing your experience, I'm so happy I can gain company by offering it to others, it will sit so much better with me and feel more of a mutual thing 

Kerry x

I’m sure you will get so much out of it and it will be good for the elderly too.I have experience caring for the elderly and also cared for my mother who had dementia.It’s something I have considered doing in the future.Love Jane xx

That's lovely news Kerry.....I'm sure you'll find an organisation you can work with. There's lots of opportunities out there if you look!

I've just been down to see my family for a few days....mainly my 94 year old mum, who is 'trying out' a care home. It wasn't a particularly happy visit, BUT I was really impressed by the home. They have loads of activities on offer every day, far more than any other care home I've visited. I'm sure you will be welcomed, whatever you can offer!

Best of luck!

xxx Kate

I'm lonely  too the day I was discharged from was thr day I found out my friend had been murder in his own home he was 86 and a quiet man who was Trying to pro his wife from the third who had bro into him 

His wife was suffering from a,alzheimer

I'm alone sad and feeling very vulnerable 

I am lost

Hello Cremona

I'm so sorry to read this. It must have been a huge shock for you after being discharged.

Is there anyone you can phone, or someone who can call in and keep you company for a while?

It is too late in the evening now, but the Macmillan helpline will be open tomorrow morning. If you phone, you will receive lots of support. 

Thinking of you

xxxx Kate