Dad is only a week post surgery,partial parotid gland removal full neck dissection due to cancer,dad is 79.Hes been left with a numb face and a week on is in a lot of pain with a stiff neck...all to be expected and also very very tired and weak.Mum is already moaning about having to look after him ...and to be honest I'm pissed of at her ,it's been a week ,this has knocked him for six ,what the hell did she expect..If she's fed up now and moaning what's she going to be like when dad starts radiotherapy or chemo ....you sign up for in sickness and health and I can't see the issue,I looked after my husband like a king for months when he was unwell...I didn't moan once and to be honest she's nothing else to do ,just like I hadn't ....I hate seeing dad in pain and struggling and knowing mums whining on about things,I feel like saying it's not about you at all .... But I say nothing I just don't agree with what she says and just support dad.
Hi RedTree26
It is so difficult when we see a loved one unwell and in pain. Sometimes people do react in ways we might not expect and that can be hard to see.
I wonder if the moaning might be part of your mums way of venting her own emotions. I can understand why you might not want to say anything about it but hope that you can contine to support your dad. I know something I had to learn was how to look after myself.
<<hugs>>
Steve
