My husband had a staging laproscopy yesterday. Afterwards we received the devastating news that the cancer has spread to 3 spots outside his stomach which means no further surgery will be considered. He had a part gastronomy to remove the main tumour but the type of cancer is very aggressive. He is in his late 40’s. We have two wonderful children below the age of ten. He is the most amazing human being and I am not ready for the possibility of him leaving us so soon. We were supposed to grow old together. I feel lost at the thought of life without him. We need time to process everything that happened yesterday and work out a way to move forward. We like to look for the positives in everything but this has beaten us! Does anyone have any tips or advice on how we can get ourselves out of this horrible cloud? There have been many tears flowing today. Luckily the children are with close family for the half term.
Hi Carrie80
Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.
I am Steve one of the community champions and my expereince of cancer is via my wife who has Leiomyosarcoma.
Sorry to hear about your husband, that does sound like difficult news though I hope you will have an appointment soon to see what options you might have going forward.
Some of the things you talk about are quite common parts of anticipatory grief, there is quite a good article about this here. I ended up doing a living with less stress course and part of that was learning to appreciate what we have on a day to day basis rather than a future I could not control but could imagine actually worse than it turned out.
There is also quite a good guide here on talking to children and teenagers, our son was fairly young when Janice was diagnosed and we were lucky to get really good support from his schools too.
Do post on here whenever as someone is always listening but if it helps remember you can always ring the helpline too.
<<hugs>>
Steve
