Partner recently diagnosed with incurable NET cancer

Hi JKJ and welcome to our community, I hope you find it as useful as I have.

My wife's cancer is quite different, Leiomyosarcoma but it was also incurable from the start. She had two lots of chemotherapy and the second helpfully made her cancer stable and we have been that way now for over 10 years.

The first time I reached out for help was when I walked in to the Maggies at our local hospital. Later I did a living with less stress course though them and it helped me to live more in the moment rather than making plans for a dark future - and I could imagine things much worse than they actually turned out. The conscious breathing exercises was great for when live decides to throw us the odd curveball but can also be really good at helping me relax.

I find quite a lot of help in your feelings when someone has cancer quite helpful since being able to recognize the emotions and accept them as valid can help to make them less overwhelming. 

When I have talked about cancer in my workplace I found quite a few people who came up to me as they were also struggling but had never felt they could open up.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Jo youre not alone, your situation is awful. You need to fiind some you time. Are you getting any support . Go steady

Hi Steve

Thanks for taking the time to reply and it was really helpful - thank you.  We don't have a Maggie's centre near us but they sound great.  I did read the link that you posed though and that did help.

Not many people know at work but I think I need to find someone to share with, definitely.

I'll take some positivity from you and your wife's story, I hope she is still going strong and you're doing ok

Jo 

Hi

No I guess I'm not but wouldn't know where to reach out for support.  I will look at finding some time for me though as I think that will help.  Thank you for replying.

Jo

Hi Jo,

I totally understand how you feel. I’m in my 30s and my husband was diagnosed with an incurable cancer last year. It’s been a very difficult time - he’s on his fifth line of treatment now and I too am trying to do everything to support my partner and work full time. I also find some days I cope and other days I just feel so angry and sad at the hand we’ve been dealt in life. 

I had some counselling last year - both through the NHS and through my work. It helped to a certain extent. I think in time you get into a routine with your new life. You will have good days and bad days. I find it important to talk - so continue to message on here, or perhaps even write down your feelings in your phone to get things off your chest, even if you don’t send your thoughts and feelings to anyone else. 

Life eh! You’re not alone though. X

Also, if you’re able to direct message on here - I don’t know if you are - but you’d be welcome to direct message me to have a rant if it would help. :-) Take care. 

Hi JKJ 

Janice has been amazing especially when I have had my own health issues.

We have a tool on the website in your area that can help find sources of help near you if you enter your postcode. Sometimes it can be helpful to use the hospital postcode too.

<<hugs>>

Steve